The Secret's in the Telling
by Etherockj
Summary: Severitis. After the events in the graveyard at the end of the Triwizard Tournament, Harry returns to Privet drive to discover the truth behind his parentage. With the experiences of his fourth year, and the return of Voldemort, Harry begins to take matters into his own hands and stop allowing the wizarding world to run him over. Warnings for child abuse and rape
1. A Rapid Loss of Hope

AN: So whoops, I didn't think to add any warnings...I'm really sorry if my story upset/triggered/offended anyone. Soooo I'm now adding that this story deals with severe child abuse, rape, and possibly other nasties that I'll try to remember to warn for if/when they come up. Thanks to the reviewer who kindly pointed out that I forgot warnings. Sorry about that, didn't mean to be a dick!

July 20, 1995

Harry Potter had been back at Privet Drive for less that a month but already he could feel himself wasting away. Not only was he suffering from nightmares of Cedric's murder causing him to wake the whole house with his screaming, but his uncle had taken it upon himself to shut Harry up through any means necessary. Being fed small meals of stale bread and nearly sour milk three times a week while being worked to the bone day in and day out hadn't been enough to keep the nightmares at bay even as Harry collapse every night due to shear exhaustion. As his bones became more prominent, his will to live less strong, and his uncle's temper rose to previously unthought-of levels, Harry had known it would only be a matter of time before Vernon's trusty belt would make an appearance again.

It had been since before he learned about Hogwarts that Harry had had a true beating. Sure his aunt might swing the frying pan at his head now and again, and yes Uncle Vernon might shout and shake him until he felt his brain rattle around inside his skull, but no _true_ beating had occurred since Harry's Hogwarts letters had fluttered into Privet Drive. Before Hogwarts though, well that was an entirely different story. Before Hogwarts, before it became apparent that the wizarding world _was_ actually keeping some sort of watch over him, Harry had endured what could only be described as hell. Vernon Dursley was not a wise man, nor was he a great thinker. What he was, however, was a man who always looked out for his own skin. That said, Vernon had been very careful to never leave marks on Harry's face or hands. So many layers of Dudley's old castoffs did wonders in masking his malnutrition and absorbing any blood or drainage that might seep out of open wounds left from his uncle's tender care.

Like many other nights this summer, Harry jerked awake screaming and panting. This particular nightmare had been as awful as it was strange. It had started out like many other. Voldemort had ordered Wormtail to "Kill the spare" and it had continued with memories of that night. It had even featured the ghosts of Cedric and his parents taunting him that he was weak and worthless. That it should have been him that died that night. None of this was new to Harry. Sure it hurt to hear such things said to him, especially by his parents, but it was nothing more than the truth. They were right after all. Everyone close to him ended up hurt or dead. He'd always been nothing, but now he was a nothing with a body count. Where this dream had gotten strange however, was that as he ran from Voldemort and his followers, he had ended up in a long hallway with a door at the end. He ran as fast as he possibly could, which after years of Harry Hunting was pretty damn fast, yet it still wasn't enough for him to gain much distance from Voldemort and his merry band of death munchers. Running in terror, Harry finally reached the door. It was locked and refused to open no matter when spells he used against it. Just as Voldemort was about to kill him, the bright green light of avada kedavra blooming at the tip of his wand, Harry woke.

While Harry had been lost in the memories of his dream, Vernon had stomped down the hallway and unlocked Harry's door. Harry startled as his door slammed into the bedroom wall with an almighty bang. Whipping around, he saw his uncle purple with rage, beady eye wild. Breathing heavily through his nose, Vernon stomped steadily closer to Harry on his bed. Scrambling back, Harry hit the corner of his small bed and held his arms up in front of his face whimpering for his uncle not to hurt him.

"THAT'S ENOUGH BOY! THIS IS THE LAST TIME YOU AND YOU FREAKISHNESS WILL WAKE ME AND MY FAMILY IN THE DEAD OF THE NIGHT! IF YOU CAN'T SLEEP IN SILENCE LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE, THEN IT'S BACK TO THE CUPBOARD WITH YOU!" Vernon was practically panting by the time he was done but still maintained the energy to remove his belt and manhandle Harry onto his stomach. Years of experience had allowed Harry to lay still and take the belting in silence despite being frozen it terror and in utter agony. As Vernon brought the belt down across his back again and again, he screamed at Harry telling him everything Harry knew but didn't want to hear.

"WORTHLESS—MURDERING—FREAK!" each insult punctuated with a slice of the belt across his back. "EVEN YOUR PARENTS GOT THEMSELVES KILLED TO GET AWAY FROM YOU! AND NOW WE'VE BEEN LANDED WITH YOU AND YOUR FREAKY WAYS! WELL NO MORE! I'LL TEACH YOU YOUR PLACE ONCE AND FOR ALL!" That said, Vernon procured a knife out of seemingly nowhere, and carved _FREAK_ across his shoulders and _WORTHLESS_ down his side. Panting, Vernon got up, grabbed Harry by the collar of his shirt, and dragged him down the stairs and through him in the cupboard before locking it up tight.

When Harry regained consciousness the next morning, he slowly maneuvered himself into a sitting position and pushed on his cupboard door. Fortunately it was unlocked so Harry made his way to the kitchen to make breakfast for the Dursleys. He would not allow himself to think about what had happened last night. He would continue on with his life as if nothing had changed and he would put it all out of his mind. Deserving or no, Harry would not allow last night's punishment to break him. The words no permanently etched into his skin were a reminder of the truth and he vowed to himself then and there that he would do better, be better. No more running off into danger, no more slacking off with Ron when he should be learning. Voldemort had returned and Harry had to be prepared to face him. That decided, Harry made a full English breakfast and set the table. Snatching his chores list off the counter, Harry quickly exited the kitchen to avoid being seen by his uncle.

At the top of his list was to wash all the windows. Sighing, Harry got to work so that there was at least a chance of making a dent in the long list of chores before the day's end. Gathering his supplies, Harry started on the front windows figuring he'd appreciate the shade of the back garden as the sun continued to rise in the sky.

Some time later, Harry had moved onto the windows in the back garden, which as he predicted, were in the shade during the heat of the day. Harry scrubbed away at the windows despite that open wounds on his back and side screaming in protest. He knew that if his work suffered his beatings would only get worse. He was mentally cursing Dumbledore for continuing to make him return to this hell hole when his aunt came out the back door and glared as she approached him. Clearly she wasn't satisfied with his work even though they both knew that he could always get the house cleaner than she could. A fact the obviously vexed her to no end and which filled him with a smug sort of satisfaction. "We're going out," Petunia snapped. "That chores list better be finished before we return." With that, Petunia returned inside, and a few minutes later, the family car could be heard backing out of the driveway and pulling off.

* * *

Several backbreaking hours later, Harry entered the kitchen. The last task on his list was to clean any expired food out of the kitchen cupboards and organize the contents. This was a new chore. Between Vernon and Dudley, there was seldom any food left sitting for a week, let alone long enough to expire. Regardless, Harry got to work since questioning the necessity of his various chore had only led to pain for him in the past.

About halfway through the cupboards, Harry came upon a slightly crumpled box of water crackers. It was in the back corner of the highest shelf so had likely been pushed back and never thought of again. Opening the box, Harry went to check the crackers, hoping they might still be edible so he could hide them under his cot mattress in his cupboard for emergencies. Judging by the state of the box and the printed expiration date, which was far too long ago to be salvageable, he wasn't hopeful. Even sealed, crackers as old as he was wouldn't last. Much to his disappointment, there were folded up papers roughly shoved in the box. Curiosity getting the better of him, Harry removed the bundle of papers. To his absolute shock, it was not papers inside, but parchment. Wizarding parchment. Parchment that wizards used. In the Dursley's house. The Dursley's house where magic wasn't allowed and everything was completely and utterly normal.

Gathering himself, having sat and stared at the parchment bundle in bewilderment for several long minutes, Harry shoved the bundle in the large pockets of his oversized jeans and got back to work. He could read through the parchments later. For now, he had work to do if he wanted to still be able to move the next day. Harry's work became mechanical as his mind was raced over the significance of parchment. _What on earth was Aunt Petunia doing saving wizarding parchment. It had to be Petunia after all. Vernon and Dudley had never had contact with the wizarding world, particularly not back in 1981 when those Crackers expired._ Unable to reach any conclusions, especially with the parchments still unread, Harry tried to put the matter from his mind. Like always, however, thoughts of wizards contacting Aunt Petunia kept slipping into his mind. Harry had just finished with the cupboards when the Dursley's car could be heard pulling into the drive.

* * *

Later that night, Harry sat on his cot mattress with a torch he'd nicked from the cupboards as he'd organized them this afternoon. On his lap was the bundle of parchments. With shaking hands, Harry removed the loose parchments that were wrapped in a larger piece of parchment and tied with string. Inside were letters from his mother's friends. There was a litter from Remus, another from a Marlene McKinnon, and another from a Mary McDonald. Harry had never heard the two girls mentioned before although he'd barely had time to learn much about his parent from either Remus or Sirius, especially not about his mother. Putting the letters aside, Harry next came to a small pile of wizarding photos. Several contained his mother and two girls, the backs of the pictures labeled with Mary, Marlene and Lily confirming the girls identities. The last, was a picture of his mother and a tall, thin boy with pale white skin and dark black hair that hung into his face. His mother's arm was around the boy's waist as she waved at the camera and periodically leaned her head on the boy's shoulder. The boy however paid the camera no mind. His sole focus was Harry's mum. He looked down at her with a fond smile and his arm around her shoulder. The boy looked familiar but with his hair in his face and his head turned towards his mother, Harry couldn't place him. This photo unfortunately wasn't labeled, so Harry set it aside and moved onto the last piece of parchment from the bundle. The last piece of parchment was an official looking document.

Birth Certificate of Harry James Potter

St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries

Born July 31, 1980

Mother: Lily Marie Evans

Father: Severus Tobias Snape

All the blood drained from Harry's face. Snape was his father. His most hated professor who took great joy in taunting, belittling, and insulting him was his father. _It can't be_ thought Harry. _I look just like James Potter, everyone says so. And really, what are the chances that no one knew Snape was my father. Rumors spread faster than light in the wizarding world. If Snape was his father someone would have known and spilled the information. No_ Harry decided _I already have enough family members who loath my very existence. My father his James Potter and that's all there is to it._ With that, Harry wrapped the bundle back up, tucked it under his cot mattress, and vowed to take any information regarding Snape his his possible paternal connections to the grave.


	2. The Best Deceptions

June 28, 1996

Severus Snape stood in Dumbledore's newly decluttered office. He couldn't believe the nerve of that brat! How dare he throw a temper tantrum and destroy another person's things. And his superior at that! But of course, Harry Bloody Potter can do anything he wants! Consequences be damned! But that was obvious. Not even taking into consideration the flagrant rule breaking the boy was never punished for while in the school, just last night he caused a battle that ended in the death of his precious mutt. Severus was unwilling to even consider for a second the positives that had come out of that night. No, to Severus Snape it didn't matter that many inner circle death eaters had been capture or that the ministry was finally willing to admit that the Dark Lord had indeed returned. No, anything achieved by the spawn of that arrogant twit James Potter was ignored, or when it could not be ignore, twisted until it could be seen in a negative light again.

Dumbledore sat behind his desk picking apart two lemon drops watching Severus with that damned twinkle in his eye. Severus sent a pointed glared at Dumbledore when he made to pick up the dish of lemon drops and offer one to Severus as he sat down. "What do you want, Headmaster? Or did you merely call me here to force a diabetic coma on me that you continue to attempt giving yourself?" Dumbledore chuckled in reply. "No my boy, I did not call you here for a social visit although I would not be against spending time with you for purposes outside of the school and the Order." At this, Severus deepened his glare. "Straight onto business as always I see," Dumbledore smiled. "Very well, I wish to discuss the coming school year, my boy. Due to the coming war and the needs of the students in regards to safety and training, staffing changes need to be made." Dumbledore began. "That being said, it is my intention to bring back Horace Slughorn to teach at Hogwarts. Do you know what that means, Severus?" Standing from his seat, "No! No, absolutely not!" Severus exclaimed. "No, I finally got rid of the brat! There's no way he could possibly have achieved an O on his potions O.W.L. No! I'm finally free of him in my class!" Severus began pacing and muttering to himself about arrogant spawns of the devil.

Folding his hands in his lap, Albus looked at Severus over his half moon spectacles. "Have a seat Severus." After glaring at Dumbledore a moment more, Severus took his seat. "Now, I had promised never to reveal what I am about to tell you however, at this point I feel the benefits far outweigh promises made to those who are now dead." At this Severus jerked his eyes to meet the headmaster, not liking where this was going. "Nearly sixteen years ago, August of 1980 to be exact, Lily Potter came to me with surprising news. You see she had little Harry with her and as she explain, it became apparent what was the matter. As I'm sure you recall, Lily married James and became pregnant not 3 months after you gained your potions mastery and joined Voldemort." Here, Severus growled and looked away from Albus. "I do not mention that time to hurt you, my boy. It is however, important to this story. I tell you this now, despite my promise in the hopes that you will leave the past in the past and focus on the war and learn to work with young Harry and see him for who he truly is. As I continue to tell you Severus, he is not James Potter." Snape leap from his seat once more "He is just like that arrogant, quidditch obsessed prat! Breaking the school rules with no consequences, strutting about like he owns the place! Of course he's just like his father!" At this, Severus threw himself back down into his chair only to be met with a poorly concealed smile and that thrice damned twinkle. "It is funny you should say that Harry is just like his father in light of what I am about to tell you. You see in early August 1980, not even a month after Harry was born, Lily came to me with a predicament. You see the war was picking up, as you know, and Lily feared that if this information was not entrusted to another that it might die with her." Albus reached into a draw in his desk and removed a vile of potion, setting it on the desktop. Severus observed the potion but surprisingly could not identify it. "I can see that you do not recognize this potion," Albus continued "I am not surprised as it is a custom antidote to an ancient charmed potion. As I was say, Lily came to me with a secret. This secret involved her son and his father. You see when you joined Voldemort, Lily had just discovered she was with child. Scared for the safety of her unborn child, and the safety of the child's father who was also involved in the war and could have been hurt through the use of his child, Lily decided to run. She needed strong protection and she found that in the arms of a man from an old Pureblood family on the side of the light. She liked this man in her own way but did not love him, yet she would do anything to protect her child and the father of the child, the man she loved.

Severus couldn't take the hedging around the point one moment longer. "For once in you life Albus, say what you mean to say! So Lily left the man she loved to marry a rich old Pureblood? I don't believe you, she died married to that fool James Potter! She never left him!" Albus sighed, "You mistake me, my boy. I said she ran to a man from an old Pureblood family, not that the Pureblood himself was old. Lily ran from her one true love _to_ James Potter. Are you catching me meaning?"

Severus mind was racing. This couldn't mean what he though Albus was trying to tell him. "Lily left her one true love for James Potter. But Lily was with me up until she went and married that arrogant fool. You mean to say—" here Severus trailed off, unable to go on. Albus merely raised an eyebrow. "It seems you catch my meaning after all. Yes, you are the father of Harry James Potter. This potion is the antidote to the charmed potion Lily fed to Harry as an infant. I don't know where she found the potion. It is very old and banned here in England for quite some time. It requires the blood of another you see. Lily used the potion to make Harry look like James so that no one would suspect. The charmed element of the potion allowed it to grow and change along with Harry. When the war was over she would have come out with the truth. She told me only so that if the worst were to happen, you and Harry could be reunited once the war ended. As it is she asked me to promise not to share what she had done unless there was no other choice."

Severus couldn't move. He couldn't even blink. He had a son. A son with the woman he loved above all others. His Lily. He was a father and he was as cruel and unloving as his own. Tears gathered in his eyes. Severus sat remembering every interaction he had with Potter— _No! Harry—_ over the years. Severus could not help but let the tears fall. He had a child with Lily. Something he had wanted more than anything in the world. A child of his and Lily's, proof of their love and another to carry on a piece of Lily in this world when they were both dead and gone. He sat there in shock. In his mind's eye, every taunt, insult, and humiliation he had rained down on his own son played through his memory. From humiliating him in his very first potions class with questions from the sixth year curriculum all the way to occlumency lessons where he had taunted his son over his guilt and devastation of first the death of Cedric Diggory and then the attack of dementors on his cousin. He had taunted the boy. He called the boy arrogant yet now that he was willing to see reality where Harry was concern, he could see a boy who was tormented by his cousin (because yes he had seen but ignored those memories) and yet mourned the loss of his cousin's soul and berated himself for not being there to protect the cousin he hated from the dementors his cousin had no chance of fighting. Finally, Severus came to the night of the ministry fiasco. How he sneered at his son's cry for help. How he went and goaded the mutt (not that he was sorry for that) as he checked on his safety. He recalled the disingenuous thoughts he had about the boy not and hour earlier. Shame spread through the potions master and weighed him down.

Albus cleared his throat to get the potion master's attention. "So now you understand. Harry is not James. He is his own person and he is hurting—" here Albus was cut off as Severus once again flew up from his seat. "Where is my son? I need to get my son and apologize. He'll never forgive me but I must see him! Tell me Albus, his address. What is his address?" Albus looked at Severus and began "I'm not able to let you take Harry from his relatives Severus—" Albus was once again cut off by an irate potions master. "YOU'RE NOT ABLE?! YOU ARE NOT ABLE?! YOU KEEP MY SON FROM ME FOR SIXTEEN YEARS AND YOU DARE?!" Sighing, Albus relented "Harry lives at Number 4 Privet Drive in Surrey—" and with that the potions master spun on his heel and charged from the room, his robes billowing behind him with the same grace as always. Albus popped another lemon drop in his mouth and put his head in his hands and sighed.


	3. Bend and Not Break

June 28, 1996

Today was not going well for Harry. He had barely been back an hour and already Vernon was using him for stress relief. _Damn the Order for telling the Dursley's that Sirius is dead!_ Harry chocked down guilt at the thought of Sirius. No they hadn't known each other very long or very well, but Sirius was a firm link to his parents. Living, breathing proof that his parents were good people and that there were adults in the world who liked him for more than being The-Boy-Who-Lived. So what is Sirius expected him to be just like James? So what is Sirius was so emotional and childish that Harry couldn't really confide much of anything in him? Sirius was his godfather and therefore he mattered. _He mattered so much that you led him to his death?_ People die in wars, but Harry couldn't help but take full responsibility for what had happened at the Department of Mysteries. Despite dedicating himself to his studies, much to Ron's chagrin and Hermione's pleasure, Harry still fell back on old habits and rushed to handle everything himself instead of thinking things through. Even with Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall away from Hogwarts, Snape was always there. Despite how much Snape hated Harry and even though Harry had not dared go near Snape since the incident with the pensieve, he _was_ an Order member and probably would have recognized a false vision without needing to break into the floo network, lead a professor into the Forbidden Forest, and then fly off to the Ministry on threstrals. _Well one good thing came out of all of this though_ Harry thought to himself _Now I know my occlumency shields hold up against Voldemort. Snape might not have recognized my shields for what they were but I knew that if I put lesser 'bad memories' in his view that he wouldn't realize that they were the shield blocking everything he can never know._ Harry knew if Snape had seen Harry's discovery of their familial connection there would be hell to pay. As it was, Harry had bigger things to worry about now that he was back at Privet Drive. Namely, Vernon's new found punishment that he had developed at the end of last summer when belting the _freakishness_ out of him didn't seem to help. At that moment, the front door slammed shut. Harry shuddered and waited for what was to come.

* * *

Severus walked briskly down the corridor to his rooms. He couldn't believe the headmaster! Albus knew how much Lily's apparent betrayal had affected him and how badly he had wanted children with his Lily. _Yes, and what a lovely parent you've made_ Severus sneered internally. _Not only have you alienated your own son to the point that he'll likely never forgive you, but you also terrorized an entire generation of children you taught in potions._ Sure he had a role to play as a spy, but he crossed the line into abuse long ago. He shook his head, ashamed of himself. He needed a plan. If he was going for his son he needed to arrive with more than a long overdue apology. _Remus! He's close to my son and might know what to do._ Severus paused in thought. He had been cold and cruel to the wolf since Lily had left him while Remus had remained her friend. Moving over towards hearth, Severus threw some floo powder into the fire and called out for Grimmauld Place.

* * *

Remus Lupin was sitting at the kitchen table in Grimmauld Place staring into his cup of tea. He spent much of his time staring off these days. He couldn't see a reason to do much of anything else. The last of his original pack was gone, if you didn't count Pettigrew that is (which he didn't), and his cub had been ripped away from him once more and sent back to live with those horrid relatives. He knew something was wrong there. He could smell the fear and pain emanating from Harry when they left him at King's Cross and he could see the calculating look his uncle had given him and the anger simmering just below the surface. He had begged the headmaster to allow him to be with his cub this summer but was once again denied. Sighing, he was about to get up and sit in the library and stare off again when the fire flashed green and Severus' face appeared calling his name.

"Lupin. Remus" Severus began "you're here, good. I'm coming through. I need to discuss something with you." Remus watched has Severus disappeared from the flame for a moment before his whole body stepped through. Remus hadn't seen Severus this out of sorts since things ended with Lily. Moving to refresh his tea and pouring a cup for Severus, both men sat at the table and Lupin waited for the potions master to tell him what had his so upset.

"I hardly know where to begin," Severus admitted looking straight into Remus' eyes. "The headmaster informed me of something today and I need your help." Remus sat up straighter. If Severus Snape was asking for help, it must be serious. "Albus revealed that in August 1980, Lily came to him and informed him that Harry is in fact my son not James." Remus sucked in a breath, eyes widening. "I am going to retrieve Harry from his relatives but I need help. I somehow have to explain that I am his father and then ask him to come home with me. As I obviously know nothing about my son except the lies I chose to tell myself all these years, I'm asking you to help me. How to I approach him? How do I convince him to give me a chance?"

Remus sat for a moment looking at Severus. "I won't do you the disservice of asking if you mean to take Harry with you as some twisted revenge against James. I can see plainly that you are concerned and that you care. I do not know how best to approach Harry with this information, but I'd suggest being honest with him. Harry is very forgiving and the thing he wants most in the world is a family of his own. The only time I've seen him truly upset and irrational, is when information is kept from him, especially when it is because others feel it is for his own good." Snape nodded, considering what Remus had said. "I know it has been a long time, but we were friends once and you are close to my son. Will you come with me to collect Harry from his relatives? You would be welcome to stay with us at Spinner's End if I can convince Harry to come with me." Remus didn't even have to think about it. "I had wanted to keep Harry with me this summer from the very start but the headmaster wouldn't allow it. Let's go. I don't have a good feeling about those relatives." Looking alarmed, Severus stood and both men made their way out of Number 12 Grimmauld Place into the night and apparated to Surrey.

* * *

Harry groaned and wrapping his arm around his stomach hoping to brace his broken ribs. Well hadn't that been one hell of a welcome home. He'd known after last year when Aunt Petunia had started going through 'the changes' that he was in trouble. Not only did Vernon like to feel in control and superior but he also liked finding new and inventive ways to punish Harry. This had been Vernon's favorite hobby since Harry was a child. When being hit by a frying pan didn't help young Harry cook fast or prepare better meals, then Vernon had decided that holding his arm to the cooking element might just be the motivation Harry needed to produce better results. When allowing Dudley to beat Harry to keep him from 'getting ideas above his station' didn't yield the results Vernon desired, he had started belting Harry himself. When belting wasn't cruel enough for Vernon's tastes, carving hateful words into Harry's skin had begun. And then by the end of last summer, Vernon had finally arrived at an idea that Harry had been dreading yet expecting for some time. Yes, once Vernon decided Harry needed to be beaten down further, he'd begun raping Harry after he'd been beaten. After all, now that Vernon wasn't able to exert his masculinity and dominance with Petunia, he'd needed another outlet. Vernon may not get new ideas often but he was perfectly happy to combine old ideas. So it was that before Harry returned to school for his fifth year, Vernon had decided to give Harry a send off to remember him by. After belting Harry from shoulders to knees and raping him to near unconsciousness, Vernon had grabbed his trusty carving knife and etched the word _WHORE_ into Harry's lower back like a tramp stamp written sloppily by a disturbed five year old.

Shaking his head to forget the past, Harry braced himself and slowly exited his cupboard to begin his work for the day. Naturally he wouldn't be fed as he'd only arrived at Privet Drive the night before. Moving into the kitchen, Harry glanced at the infamous cupboard that had changed his entire life last summer. Ever since that day, Harry had never been able to ignore the otherwise unremarkable cupboard again. Moving to the fridge, Harry removed eggs, bacon, and milk to begin the Dursley's breakfast. Harry had just finished placing the last of the serving dishes on the table as Dudley stomped through the kitchen door and shoved Harry aside to take his seat. Harry had to bite his tongue to keep from crying out as his battered body was jostled.

As the day drew to a close, Harry was on his last chore. Having completed the indoor cleaning during the heat of the day, and finished weeding the front garden, all Harry had left to do was mow the lawn and he'd be able to return to his cupboard and try to get some rest. As Harry opened the shed, Vernon came barreling out the back door as fast as a man of his size possibly could. Jowls jiggling and face puce with rage, Vernon approached Harry shouting "WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS BOY? WHY ARE YOUR CHORES NOT COMPLETE? I SPEND ALL DAY WORKING TO PROVIDE THE ROOF OVER YOUR HEAD, WHICH YOU DON'T DESERVE, AND THE FOOD THAT YOU TAKE FROM MY OWN FAMILY AND THIS IS MY THANKS? YOU LAZY FREAK! JUST LIKE THOSE NO GOOD FREAK PARENTS OF YOURS!" Harry, now far more skilled in occlumency than he had been summer before third year, refrained from reacting in anyway to the slights against his parents let alone blowing someone up. Despite Vernon's constant need to shout until he was out of breath, the words rolled off Harry as if they'd been whispered. Harry jerked back to attention when Vernon grabbed him by the upper arm and shoved him to stand facing the shed. Harry knew what was coming. He retreated into his mindscape to distance himself from the pain of Vernon's belt buckle connecting with his back. Finally what could have been minutes later or even hours, Vernon stopped bringing the belt down on Harry's back and could be heard rustling with the button and fly of his trousers. Harry braced himself for this continued indignity but it never came.

* * *

Remus and Severus arrived around the corner on Magnolia Walk and quickly made their way to Privet Drive. Severus stepped towards Number 4 and knocked sharply. Petunia answered the door, saw who was calling, and tried to slam the door shut, all blood having drained from her face. Severus stuck his foot in the door and shoved it back open. "Now that's no way to welcome a visitor, unless the muggle world is much changed since we last met." Remus and Severus pushed into the house and immediately Severus was drawn to the door to the cupboard under the stairs. He remembered from the ill-fated occlumency lessons that this particular cupboard featured often and typically right before Harry was able to successfully repel Snape from his mind. Curious, Snape approached the door and opened the lock, brushing off Petunia's attempts to intercept him. Opening the door, Severus was shocked to find an old cot mattress stained with blood, dirt, and what looked suspiciously like urine. Severus was about to close the cupboard door when he saw an old drawing stuck to the cupboard wall. It was a crayon drawing with _Harry's Room_ inscribed upon it. Furious and disgusted, Severus whipped around and immediately dove into Petunia's mind. Snarling, he viewed every memory Petunia had of Harry. The abused rained down upon him, the cries for food and help that went ignored, the sounds of Harry being beaten and raped by his uncle only to be ignored as Petunia turned up the sound on the television set. Sensing Severus' fury, Lupin began hunting for Harry.

Remus followed Harry's scent into the backyard and behind the shed. Rounding the corner, Remus didn't even stop to think. He whipped out his wand, shouted _BOMBARDA_ and watched dispassionately and Vernon Dursley sored across the yard and landed with a large thud, a messy crater all that was left of what had just moments ago been his exposed genitals. Hurrying to Harry's side, Remus turned Harry slowly towards him and gasped at his state after just one day.

* * *

Harry saw the source of the disturbance was Remus and hung his head in shame. He had never wanted anyone to know just how bad things were at his relatives. He had been told time and time again that he must return to Privet Drive so he didn't see the point in sharing his disgrace with others.

Harry felt himself being pulled into an embrace and heard Remus whisper into his hair "It's alright now cub. We'll get you out of here and make you well again." At this, Harry lifted his head and looked at Remus. _WE?_ Harry thought to himself. _Don't tell me the whole Order is here. At least last year I had warning and was able to mask the worst of it. This is a nightmare!_ Harry hadn't even realized he'd whimpered and pulled away from Remus until he caught the sight of Snape leaning over his uncle. It appeared he was using legilimency on Vernon. _NO!_ Harry shuddered. _NO! Snape can't see what Vernon has done to me all these years! I'll never hear the end of it. He'll just have more ammunition to work into the insults he hurls at me every time we cross paths!_

* * *

Severus heard the spell fired just as he reached the back door and saw Vernon go sailing through the air out past the shed and land on the ground in a bloody heap. He took off running towards the monstrous muggle with no care to his reputation as being a cold, calculating and always under control, and immediately entered the muggle's mind fearing the muggle may die from his much deserved wound before Severus could find out just what this man had done to his son. He had just finished ruining the mind of the disgusting muggle when he heard his son whimper. Revenge for his son forgotten, Severus abandoned Vernon Dursley to his fate and approached Harry, gathered him into his arms, and caught him just in time for Harry to loose consciousness and drop towards the ground. Lifting his son into his arms, Severus looked at Remus and the two apparated to Spinner's End.


	4. This Bitter Pill

AN: _So I probably should have done this in the first chapter but didn't think of it until now. I wanted to mention that this is the first fanfiction I've ever written. I've read tons but as creative writing was never my strong suit this is my maiden voyage into writing. That said, any reviews with suggestions or criticisms are appreciated but in no way necessary for continued updates. I've always found that super lame when authors hold chapters hostage for reviews and have no intentions of doing that. So anyway, on with the story!_

June 29, 1996

Harry woke up slowly and then all at once. He could feel he was on a comfortable bed and, although sore, was not in the amount of pain he remembered feeling when last awake. But more than anything, the thing that made him snap awake was the sound of soft breathing beside him. No one was every that close to him as he slept while at Privet Drive unless yelling and pain was involved. Keeping his eyes closed and pretending to still be asleep, Harry took catalogue of how he felt and tried to puzzle out the situation.

He remembered doing his chores and going to the shed to mow the lawn. _But then what? I know it was something big. Remus! Remus came to Privet Drive…_ And then it hit him. The beating, waiting for his uncle to see to his trousers before he finished his punishment in the most degrading way, and Snape. Harry bit back a groan not wanting to alert whoever was in the room with him that he was awake. _Brilliant, just absolutely fantastic. Not only did Snape know all the secrets he had worked so hard to hide but if I'm in a comfortable bed, that means that I've been removed from the Dursley's and that means even more people probably know. Madam Pomfrey at the very least must know if I've been healed._ Giving it up as a lost cause, Harry shifted in bed and let out a small groan to alert his companion to his state of consciousness. Opening his eyes, Harry turned towards where he had last heard breathing and was relieved to see Remus dozing in an armchair positioned near the bed. Clearing his throat, Harry attempted to get the werewolf's attention.

Remus had known the moment Harry woke but gave him some time to adjust to the land of the living once more. Hearing Harry clear his throat, Remus turned to his honourary godson and looked him over. Harry looked apprehensive and guarded, but otherwise quite well. His color was it's usual deep tan and his short time staying with the Dursley's this summer meant he didn't have that cachectic look to him that usually accompanied Harry's return to the wizarding world after a summer with the muggles. Taking a deep breath, Remus began "I'm sure you're probably wondering where you are. We're at Spinner's End, it's Severus' home away from Hogwarts." At this, Remus saw Harry's eyes widen but otherwise give no reaction one way or the other. Taking it as a good sign, Remus continued "I'm not sure how much you remember, but Severus and I arrived at the Dursley's and found you with your uncle." Here, Harry turned his head, looking away from his godfather in all but name. "I don't want you to be ashamed, Harry. You were very brave for a very long time, but that is all in the past now. After healing you, Severus left us to ourselves thinking that waking to a friendly face might be preferable to you." Hearing that Severus had been the one to heal him, Harry looked up and asked "Does that mean no one else knows what happened, besides you and Snape I mean?" Remus replied, "No Harry, only Severus and myself are aware of what occurred in that house. That will be the case unless you chose to tell others of your experiences there. Now, I'm going to fetch Severus so that he can make sure you are healing the way you should and then I'll return with your lunch."

Not at all thrilled about being in close quarters with Snape, especially not knowing that Snape knew of his shame, Harry just got himself settled sitting up in bed and tried to present himself as in control as possible. The last thing he wanted was to be lying down and vulnerable as Snape mocked and insulted him. Not wanting to give Snape the satisfaction of getting to him, Harry did not ask for Remus when Snape entered his room a few minutes later.

* * *

Severus was a tense bundle of nerves. He had never behaved like this before but, then again, he had never been in a situation anything like the one he currently found himself in. He had a long lost son and they were finally reunited. It was like something out of a story, but this story was much more complicated than your average family bonding tale. He and his son already knew each other and their relationship was adversarial to say the least. Not only was he an enemy in the eyes of his son, but his son was also badly abused and likely saw him as another abusive adult in his life.

Severus would never forget the things he had seen in the mind of Vernon Dursley for as long as he lived. While he had spent 5 years treating his son "just like everyone else" to put him in his place and prove that celebrity wasn't everything, his son had endured torture at the hands of his relatives until he began attending Hogwarts and then for every summer thereafter. Severus was amazed that Harry had hidden his abuse so well for so long. The evidence of abuse was written all across his son's body. It was carefully contained to the areas typically covered by clothing. Clenching his fist, Severus remembered the words carved into his son. _Those muggles will pay. I don't care if it has to look like an accident to avoid spending the rest of my son's life in Azkaban. THEY. WILL. PAY._ Gathering his courage, Severus approached the door to his son's room and knocked to enter, squashing down the desire to have Remus with him as a buffer, unaware that his son was quashing a similar desire. _I am a spy in Voldemort's inner circle goddamn it! I can handle a frail sixteen year old boy!_ With that, Sever straightened his shoulders and entered the room upon hearing his son call out for the visitor to come in.

* * *

Harry braced himself for Snape's biting comments. Carefully blanking his face, he kept his eyes down on the coverlet spread across his legs. Even though he knew he was a skilled occlumense in his own right, Harry refused to meet Snape's eyes and tempt fate. Fate had a nasty habit of taking Harry's already shitty life and making it worse.

Harry heard Snape approach his bedside and tensed. "I'm going to run a scan to ensure you are healing as desired. No doubt you are aware that your level of injury will not be healed overnight. For the foreseeable future, I'll be providing you with a nutrient potion to be taken in addition to your meals. These will hopefully replace the vitamins and minerals you lack to strengthen your bones and should also expedite your weight gain." Harry watched as Snape pulled the chair Remus had recently vacated closer to the bed and sat down looking directly at Harry who would not make eye contact. "I also, have something I wish to tell you that has recently come to light. Indeed, the reason I had arrived with Remus at you're relatives house is because of this information."

Here Harry interrupted, "Why are you calling him Remus? I thought he was Wolf or at the very least Lupin but always with a sneer?" Harry knew he was playing with fire but at this point he had nothing left to lose. Snape knew his dirtly little secret. Nothing mattered anymore anyway. He was ruined either way.

Snape did something Harry didn't expect in the face of such 'arrogance' and 'impertinence' however. No, instead of a cruel tirade on the defects of Harry's character, intelligence, and pedigree, Snape just put his face in his hands, elbows resting on his knees. An unpredictable Snape was even worse than an irate one. Especially in light of Harry's uncovered secret, this unusually calm Snape was not a welcome change.

Severus could just scream at his old self, his self of about 24 hours ago. How idiotic he had been. To think he thought himself an expert spy, a cold and indifferent Slytherin who wasn't a slave to his emotions like those moronic Gryffindors. What a hypocrite he was. If anything, he was led around by his emotions on an even shorter leash than the most volatile Gryffindor. Internally groaning, Severus tried again.

"I was unconscionably cruel to Remus two years ago. I reacted to disappointment like a child throwing a tantrum. I have spoken with him and he has forgiven me though I know not why as I certainly don't deserve it. I came to talk to you about something very personal in nature because I felt you had the right to know."

Severus was slightly concerned as he saw all the blood drain from Harry's face. Perhaps he had missed something last night. Afraid he would lose his son before he even got a chance to tell him how sorry he was, Severus jumped up, preparing to cast a diagnostic charm. He cursed himself for not immediately seeing to his son's health. What a phenomenal parent he made! Even while trying all he could do was cause his son more harm! Briefly, in the back of his mind, Severus considered that he was being overdramatic and behaving like a lunatic but quickly cut that thought off before it went any further.

Harry flinched when Snape whipped out his wand, an action that did not go unnoticed by the potions master. Snape cast a spell at him though nothing seemed to happen but at least he wasn't in any pain. That did little to reassure Harry however. _Bollocks! What if he's about to discuss our…familial ties? He had no interest in me as a son until now. He's probably about to try and parent me out of pity. Like I need his pity! No, no. More like, he's going to try and get me to reveal even more to him since he's my father, as if that means anything at all, and then he'll have even more material to use to degrade and humiliate me. That was probably a spell to record all my shameful secrets. It is Snape after all, the sadist._

Pulling himself together, Harry looked over at Snape and raised an eyebrow in challenge just as Snape released a sigh of relief. Rather than unleashing an insulting remark on Harry's bravery in the face of a wand, since he know his flinch was noted by the spy, or a taunt about his skill at being vigilant against threats, Snape remained silent. _Well isn't he being odd. I wonder…_ "What was in the jar you threw at my head a few months back at the end of occlumency lessons?" It was a risk, bring up the pensieve incident, but it was just random enough a detail that an imposter wouldn't have thought to ask. Really, Snape apologizing to Lupin, holding a civil even pleasant conversation with the Gryffindor Golden Boy, just who did this imposter think he was dealing with? This imposter clearly didn't know Snape at all.

Taken aback by the non-sequitur, Severus considered the possibility of brain damage. "It was cockroaches, a jar of cockroaches. Why do you ask?" Perhaps if the boy had some though process behind the question, the damage might not be too great to fix.

Harry was surprised that 'Snape' answered the question correctly. "It was an attempt to discover whether or not you are an imposter. I'll give it to you, you're good in some respects. That was a fairly random detail from an encounter I'm sure Snape has tried not to spread, but really, do you know the man at all? Snape has hated me probably since before I was born. The very first time I saw him, Snape glared at me like I was shit on his shoe. He's taken great delight in making sure I'm aware of just how much he loathes me and at this point, the feeling is mutual." Harry was sure that when being interrogated, Snape had shared random details like the cockroach jar but purposefully misled his captor about very basic and obvious facts so that the imposter was easy to spot. It was the only reason Harry could accept. The possibility of Snape being pleasant to him was just too fantastical, even in the magical world.

Severus tried not to allow himself to feel the hurt Harry's words had caused him. He deserved every one after all. Regrouping, Severus decided to move on from that topic and get to the point of his visit to the room. "I can assure you I am no imposter, however I doubt you will believe anything I say to prove this so I will just have to keep trying until you see the truth. The spell I cast was the diagnostic charm I mentioned before to assess your health. I apologize, I should have stated my purpose before casting a spell at you without warning. The charm revealed anticipated results. You are on the mend and can leave bed later today if you so wish. Now, the personal matter I wished to discuss with you is something I have only just learned. Right before arriving at your relatives, I was in a meeting with the headmaster and he told me something with far-reaching consequences." Severus could see that Harry was about to speak over him again and cut him off before he could start. "I'll ask you to remain silent until I finish telling you my tale. After that I will answer any question you have."

Sighing, Severus began, "After graduating from Hogwarts, I began dating your mother Lily Evans. The incident you alluded to before with the pensieve was not the end of our friendship that I so feared it to be. It took all of sixth and the majority of seventh year to earn Lily's forgiveness, but in the end she did forgive me and our friendship evolved until we were dating. By that time, I had already been marked by the Dark Lord, and a large part of the reason your mother forgave me was because I felt deep remorse and was utterly horrified by what was expected as a servant of the dark. I had initially joined in order to gain my potions mastery. Poor as I was, it would have taken me decades to save the kind of money needed to pay a master to apprentice me. None of that matter though, even if it cost me my mastery. I approached the headmaster and begged for help. He listened to my pleas and I became a spy. Not long after I began spying, your mother became pregnant. I did not know this until early this morning. You see, fearing for your life and mine, as you could be used to control me through fear for your safety, Lily left me and ran. Seeking protection, Lily married James Potter believing that with the power of an old Pureblood family, you would be safe. I won't lie, I was furious that Lily had left me for my tormentor and then when it was reported that she was pregnant two months later, I lost all reason where anything Potter was concerned. I had wanted children with Lily more than anything and she had always reasoned that we should wait until after the war for the safety of that child. Knowing, or I thought I knew anyway, that she had so quickly become pregnant with James, I believed it was me personally she just didn't want children with. Feeling the betrayal cut even deeper, I continued spying, but not with the same devotion I once had." Holding back tears, an entirely new experience for Severus, he continued. "It wasn't until just this morning in the early hours before dawn, that I learned the truth. Lily had fed you a charmed potion to make you look like James. She left the antidote with Professor Dumbledore in case anything were to happen to her. He knew all this time and only just thought to tell me!" Severus growled, briefly losing his temper but quickly reining it back in lest he frighten his son. "So the truth was finally revealed and I immediately rushed to collect you from your relatives. I stopped and asked Remus for advice before we arrived, but I came straight for you. I wish to repair the damage I've done to our relationship. I know you will likely never forgive me, but I wish you to know how truly, utterly, deeply sorry I am. I wish to know you better and I wish to make up to you all the wrongs I've lain at your door all these years. I beg you to give me a chance. I know I don't deserve it but I have to try. You are my only son."

Harry just sat there staring at Snape at a loss for words. Snape hadn't known they were related? It hardly excused his behavior but at least he was purposely cruel to his own son. Still feeling very uneasy, Harry tested the limits of Snape's new found calm and revealed "I know. I've known since the summer after the Triwizard Tournament. I just assumed you wanted nothing to do with me."


	5. Carve Your Heart Out Yourself

June 29, 1996

Severus sat there stunned. _He'd known? He already knew he was my son and never said a word. He thought I would be so cruel to my own child as I was to the Potter spawn? Well given his muggle relatives, I suppose it wasn't such a stretch for him to believe._ Observing his son, Severus noticed that he was sitting up straight in bed. His face held a look of challenge but his eyes showed the fear simmering beneath the surface proving the bravado was merely a mask. _I wonder how much of the boy I know is a mask?_ Forging on lest the silence become even more awkward, Severus asked "You knew you were my son? Why did you not approach me? Even if you thought I already knew, you could have at least acknowledged the fact or demanded support from me."

Severus knew at that moment that he had said the wrong thing. Harry's face turned red with his growing anger and he shouted "OF COURSE I NEVER SAID ANYTHING! I'VE ALREADY GOT MORE THAN ENOUGH FAMILY MEMBERS WHO DESPISE MY VERY EXISTENCE AND YOU'VE NEVER MADE A SECRET OF HOW YOU FELT ABOUT ME SO DON'T PRETEND TO CARE FOR ME NOW ALL OF A SUDDEN BECAUSE YOU FINALLY DISCOVERED I'M YOUR SON. I'M THE SAME PERSON YOU'VE KNOWN FOR FIVE YEARS AND YOU'VE MADE YOU OPINIONS ON MY INTELLIGENCE, _PAMPERED_ UPBRINGING, ATTITUDE, AND ABILITIES QUITE CLEAR FROM THE SECOND I SET FOOT IN HOGWARTS!" Harry took a deep breath trying to calm down and finished "Ironic isn't it that the father you spent so long insulting and drawing negative comparisons from was really you all along. And demand support from you? Yes, I can just imagine how well that would have gone. I'm sure you would have calmly patted me on the head and agreed to my every demand should I have come to you _demanding_ anything. Well don't worry, I don't need you to support me. I've managed just fine on my own all these years." That said, Harry fought the urge to cross his arms like a pouting child. He would not lose the upper hand here. He wouldn't.

* * *

Remus had been climbing the stairs to bring lunch up to Harry and Severus when he heard Harry begin to yell. He got to the room where Harry was staying as quickly as he could but by that point the yelling had stopped. Figuring the new family could use a breather, Remus knocked on the door loudly and pushed to enter. He set the tray down on the bedside table and handed Harry a plate with a sandwich and chips before turning to serve Severus and then taking a seat himself. "Sorry it's not much. I'm not much of a cook and had to make due with what was in the kitchen." The sandwiches were perfectly fine in Remus' opinion but he figure it was a good a way to break the ice as any.

He wasn't wrong. Harry seemed to perk up a bit and said "I can cook pretty much anything, I'll see what's in the kitchen and make up something for dinner." As soon as he said that, however, he tensed and looked over towards Severus, "as long as you don't mind me using the kitchen that is."

Remus could have groaned when Severus replied, "Having seen your potions abilities, I'm not sure my kitchen would survive your attempts at cooking and if it did, I'm not sure we would."

* * *

As soon as he said it, Severus could have cut out his old tongue. _Well done, Severus! Way to prove to your son that you seek his forgiveness and wish to develop a relationship with him!_ "Forgive me Harry. Old habits are hard to break. I wish to start over with you but I will still make mistakes now and again. It was very kind of you to offer to make dinner. I'm sure it will be delicious." Severus made eye contact with Remus trying to relay his desperate desire for help. Remus cleared his throat to try and salvage the situation, but was cut off when Harry began to speak.

Harry watched the silent exchange and decided to throw Snape a bone. If they would be stuck together all summer, he might as well make it as painless as possible. "My potions skills are actually much better than what you see in class. Since I figure you'd fail me no matter what I turned in, I didn't really see the point of trying while in class. When I want to, I can produce a usable potion. I'll never be a master, but my potions are safe to drink, I ought to know."

"In that case, I'd like to see your true potions skills as well as your cooking abilities if you'd let me."

Harry considered Snape for a long moment. "I suppose I could brew something to show you. It would be nice to get an official opinion on my abilities. I was resigned to waiting for my O.W.L. results but this works too."

Snape looked like Christmas had come early. _Apparently now that I'm his son the idea of me near a cauldron isn't so horrible._ Deciding not to look a gift horse in the mouth, Harry figured discussing his potions attempts might be a safe topic with Snape, at least for now. After all, Harry had put a lot more effort into his studies this past year.

* * *

Harry had stayed late last year after DA meetings to do studying of his own in the Room of Requirement. The duel in the graveyard during the third task, if you could even call it a duel, had motivated Harry like nothing else could. He had been woefully unprepared to face fully trained wizards let alone Voldemort. He had relied on luck and timing in the past but now people were dying and he himself would run out of luck eventually. Harry had studied everything he could on offensive magic, battle tactics, and healing. He would not be caught unprepared again. He had decided to add healing to his topics of study after Hermione had given him Essence of Murtlap to heal his hand after another detention with Umbridge. How it had never occurred to him before to look up healing techniques was a mystery considering all the ridiculous and dangerous situations he found himself in. Late to the game or not, Harry had begun studying healing which became particularly helpful when he would find himself injured over the course of his studies. Offensive battle magic was meant to maim or disable. Until he could master the new spells, accidents were bound to happen. That his study of healing helped him in potions was just a pleasant benefit. He could have smacked himself for never looking up what the different preparations meant before now. He recognized words like dicing, cubing, slicing, and cutting from cooking different recipes at the Dursley's, but in potions these words have a very specific and important meaning.

That was all in the past now. Despite learning more in a year than he had in his previous four, Harry was definitely nervous to brew a potion with Snape. "I've really only focused on healing potions but the ones I've tried have all helped. They're much better than the potions I make in class anyway. Once I discovered what the different preparation techniques meant, things got a lot easier. Who knew that slicing and cutting were totally different? Well, everyone but me apparently, but at least I know now." Harry hoped to down play what he'd learned so that Snape wouldn't expect too much of him. _Not that I care what Snape thinks! I don't care if I disappoint him. I just want to avoid the inevitable shouting match._ And though that was mostly true, Harry couldn't help but hope that he would impress Snape even just a little. Maybe it was that thirst to prove himself that the Sorting Hat had mentioned all those years ago.

* * *

His son hadn't even known the difference between cutting and slicing. Thinking back, Severus recalled noticing that Harry wasn't on the list for the introductory potions session for muggleborns. And though Harry wasn't muggleborn, he was completely muggle raised. Unlike Severus and many other half-bloods who had one magical parent to teach them the basics before attending Hogwarts, Harry had no one to help him. At the time, Snape hadn't alerted anyone to the error on the list, still too deep in his resentment of all things Potter. For his selfishness, he had to grade five years of horrible potions and had to live with the knowledge that he had failed his son again out of spite. Pinching the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger, Severus decided to be the teacher he was meant to be from the start. "I have not taught you many of the things you need to know regarding potions. I knew you were muggle raised but did not ensure that you attended the muggleborn sessions. I have wasted five years of your time as well as my own. I look forward to seeing you brew and correcting the mistakes I have made in your education. You can come to me if you need any further explanation in your studies. I want to make sure you know all the things I should have taught you before."

Severus debated internally whether or not to reveal to Harry the vow he had made to Dumbledore that Halloween night so long ago. He didn't want anyone to ever know of the vow he had made. The vow was only necessary because he had caused the death of his Lily. If he had protected her, she would be alive to protect her own son. Their son. With that thought, he decided he would tell Harry. Not to win brownie points or for any personal gain, much as the Slytherin in him protected, but because as Harry's only living parent, it was his job to protect his son. It would be far easier to protect him if Harry knew he was being protected and was therefore more cooperative with Severus, perhaps one day he'd even be trusting.

Severus considered asking Remus to leave the room so that only Harry knew of the vow but decided against it. Remus would do anything to protect his cub, the last of his pack. Having Remus on side would only aid Severus in his endeavors to protect and teach Harry.

"Fifteen years ago, the night you survived, I went to see Dumbledore, devastated at the death of your mother. I felt betrayed by Voldemort who had promised to spare her even if I was not a loyal follower. I maybe have done something drastic but then the headmaster asked me to swear a vow to protect you with my life. "

"Voldemort did keep his promise you know." Harry mumbled. "He asked her to step aside but she refused. He even asked her more than once."

"How could you possibly know that?" Severus snapped at the boy.

"I hear him. I hear my mother too actually. When I'm near the dementors I can hear my parents being killed. My dad—James, sorry—told my mum to take me and run. Voldemort tells my mum to step aside but she wouldn't. She should have just stepped aside." Harry trailed off with a shudder.

Remus of course knew about Harry's issue with the dementors, having taught him the patronus charm at the age of thirteen because he was so affected by them. Still listening to his cub describe hearing his parents' murder was painful. Remus sat on the side of Harry's bed and pulled him into a hug.

Severus would have been jealous of the closeness between Harry and Remus if he weren't still reeling from the realization that his son heard his mother's murder for an entire year when all he could think of was revenge. On a lesser level, Severus also acknowledged that Voldemort had kept his word. Not that it mattered, Voldemort was a psychotic megalomaniac. It was the last part of what Harry had said that upset him and drew him from his shock. "Your mother shouldn't have stepped aside. She loved you more than anything. She loved you so much that she began the whole charade with James. She would never have stepped aside. If she had, all three of you likely would have been killed and I never would have had the chance to know my son. Your life is worth her sacrifice."

Harry didn't really know what to say to that. But he needed time to process and so he told Snape and Remus that he wanted to nap before he made dinner. He lay down in the bed to get comfortable and was dozing off as he heard Remus gather all the dished and the two men leave the room.


	6. Lay Your Armor Down

June 29, 1996

Several hours later, Harry woke up from his nap. He really had been tired even if he had used the desire for a nap as the means to get a little alone time. Looking at the old fashioned alarm clock on his bedside, Harry noted that it was on 5:30. He had a little time to think before he needed to start dinner.

 _So Snape wants to form a bond as father and son. That's all well and good but I'm the same person I was two days ago when he hated me. We can play at family if that's what he wants. I'll have to be careful though. Right now he's shocked but happy to have discovered a son but when the shock wears off, he'll no doubt revert to how he was. After all, Vernon could be pleasant and relatively charming when someone else was around but when I did something to displease him, which was nearly all the time, he used his size and relative position of power to intimidate and control me. Snape will likely be much the same. As a teacher, the most he could really do was tower over me and shout abuse, a detention here or point loss there to round out his proof of superior power. As a father however, Snape could be equal to Vernon in_ _how he_ _shows his p_ _ower and control over me. On top of that, Snape had magic at his fingertips making him an even more dangerous adversary than Vernon ever was._

Standing from bed, Harry quickly crossed to the door and peeks into the hallway. Spotting the bathroom door ajar two doors down, Harry dashes in and showered quickly before returning to the room he was using to dress in the clothes he had arrived in. With a grimace, he rolled up the sleeves to his oversized shirt to free his hands, Harry set off to find the kitchen and begin preparing his meal.

* * *

While Harry slept upstairs, Remus and Severus had retreated to the kitchen. Remus sat at the kitchen table to watch Severus pace after spelling the dished from lunch to clean and dry themselves.

Severus didn't even know where to begin in either his thoughts or actions. He knew he needed a game plan. He had a heavily abused son who he had gravely mistreated since they met and he wanted not only to help his son recover mentally and physically from the abuse he had suffered at the hands of the muggles, but he also wanted to build a relationship with his son. Severus paced back and forth a few more times before turning to Remus. Opening and closing his mouth twice in a show of uncharacteristic indecisiveness, Severus finally addressed the werewolf.

"How do I help him?" Severus was slightly horrified at the pleading tone in his voice but for his son he would swallow his pride. "Things would have been difficult enough to salvage if it was just I who had mistreated him. How to I reach out to him when I am likely just as bad as those muggles in his eye?"

"When I taught Harry in his third year, he would light up as I told him about his parents. I was obviously able to tell him more about James than Lily, but he hears about James from a lot of people. I think if you could tell him more about his mother, you'd be well on your way to forming a more positive image of yourself in his eyes. You have to remember, that until he met Hagrid, he thought his parents had died in a car wreck while drunk."

"Perhaps after dinner I can sit and tell him a little more about Lily. It's the least I can do."

Just then, they heard movement upstairs and then heard the shower start. Hearing his son moving about, Snape began pacing again. It would be only minutes before his son arrived downstairs. He had more of a plan than when Harry fell asleep, but it still wasn't much. Hearing the shower cut off, Snape looked at Remus sitting casually at the kitchen table and decided to join him. _I can do casual. I'll just sit with Remus and Harry will see me as less threatening. Yes this is it! I know that standing over him causes him distress, until recently, I took great joy in crowding over him._ Snape had only just composed his face in what he hoped was a calm and inviting manner when the kitchen door slowly creaked open.

* * *

Harry slowly entered the kitchen giving himself plenty of time to retreat if it turned out he wasn't welcome there after all. Opening the door fully, Harry noted the Remus was sitting at the kitchen table with Snape who had a strange expression on his face. Deciding not to think too hard on it, Harry greeted his professors.

"I'd like to make dinner now if that's still alright." Harry was waiting for some sort disparaging comment for Snape again, but instead received a jerky nod and an awkward smile for his potions professor. _Okay then…_ Harry thought to himself as he approached the refrigerator. He was pleasantly surprised to find that the house had muggle appliances. He would have been out of luck if this was a fully magic household and felt like a moron for not being able to produce a meal after practically bragging about his culinary skills. _Snape would have just loved that._ As it was, Harry would be able to cook dinner provided that the house was stocked with at least the basics.

After going through the kitchen, Harry had all the ingredients to shepard's pie and a side of mushy mint peas. Getting the pie together, Harry could feel eyes on his back. Trying not to let it bother him, Harry continued to prepare his meal.

* * *

Severus knew his face wasn't the calm and inviting mask he had hoped when Harry gave him a strange look upon entering the kitchen. It was infuriating! Never in his life had Severus had so little control over his person! Setting his self-castigations aside, Severus was distressed to see the state of his son's clothing. Not only had they left without the boy's things, but he also hadn't even thought to lay out some of his own clothes for the boy the change into. Well that will be first order of business in the morning. Perhaps he would ask Remus to retrieve the boy's things from the muggles. Severus wasn't confident he could return there without leveling the entire house with his anger. He also didn't want to bring Harry there again and was reluctant to leave the boy on his own. Harry might think Severus was abandoning him already. No, he couldn't have that. He'd just have to strike a balance between being present for his son and not overcrowding him. Harry needed to know Severus was here for him!

 _After Remus gathers Harry's belongings, perhaps I can take the boy shopping. If this outfit is anything to go by, Harry will be in need of a full wardrobe._ Severus watched his son's every move as he planned their day tomorrow. Harry was preparing the meals with the sort of deft movements and graceful confidence that only comes from years of practice. Any doubts that Severus had about the meal were quickly dashed. Noting Harry's tense shoulders, Severus realized that although Harry was preparing his meal with ease, he was nervous. Focusing his gaze over to Remus, Severus noted out of the corner of his eye that Harry's muscles had relaxed minutely.

* * *

Harry popped his pie in the oven and then turned to face Remus and Snape while leaning back against the counter. Grasping in his mind for something to say, Harry decided to address Remus first since he was more comfortable with his fath—James' old friend. _James wasn't my father. That will take some getting used to. But then again, when has my life ever gone smoothly?_ Turning to the wolf, Harry asked "Will you be staying here Remus? I figure you've been living at headquarters. Speaking of headquarters, what will happen to it now?" the implied 'that Sirius is dead' was left off but was still heard by all in the room.

"Severus has kindly invited me to stay here with you both. As for headquarters, the reading of Sirius' will should happen any day now. Any beneficiaries will be summoned to Gringotts so I would anticipate an owl from the bank soon."

"Will I be allowed to attend the reading? Usually I'm not allowed to leave the Dursley's until the very end of the summer. Dumbledore typically only allows me a week or two at most," Harry cut himself off. Mentioning the Dursley's opened up the opportunity for questions, something Harry would like to avoid at all costs. Switching gears slightly, Harry continued "That is, if I'm with you and Professor Snape, would that be enough Order members to go to Gringotts?"

Harry didn't miss the look that passed between Remus and Snape. He was prepared to be let down when Snape opened his mouth to reply.

"Actually Harry, upon revealing the truth behind our relationship, the headmaster informed me of your relatives address and did not stop me when I left to gather you from their…care. The way I see it, we are in charge of your summer now. I take it that you would like to attend the reading?"

"If I'm allowed, sir." Harry said quietly. "I know we didn't know each other very long, but he was important to me and I'd like to hear his last wishes. If that's alright with you, that is."

"Then you shall attend. When I said we are in charge of your summer, I meant we. You are nearly sixteen years old, as long as you don't try to leave the house alone, I see no reason that you cannot decide how you wish to spend your time. I'd like you to see to your summer homework in a timely manner but otherwise I will not dictate to you how to spend your days. Besides, with Remus here with us, I'm sure we'll have lots of things to keep us busy. I thought we could spruce up the house a bit. I usually spend very little time here so never saw the need to do much with it, but now that I have a son to provide for, I'd like to make this house more habitable for us both."

Remus watched the father and son interacting without arguing and allowed a small smile to pull at his lips. He didn't want to draw any attention to himself thus breaking the fragile peace of the moment or else he would have been practically dancing for joy. His cub was clearly still very timid, but this summer was off to a promising start. Remus knew that once Harry got over his fear that Severus would attack him or abandon him back to the Dursley's they would be dealing with one hell of an attitude. Not that Remus blamed Harry for when he inevitably let Snape have it. Obviously he had shouted at Severus a bit when he first woke up, but Remus knew that with Lily as his mother, Harry would be stubborn and crafty when it came to making Severus earn forgiveness.

* * *

Harry removed his pie from the oven and quickly heated and mashed the peas. As he moved to set the table, he saw someone standing directly next to him and jumped back with a small shout. Severus was right beside him and he hadn't noticed.

"I apologize Harry. I thought I would help set the table since you did all the hard work making this meal. I had not intended to startle you. It smells delicious by the way."

Regaining his breath, Harry chuckled nervously. "Not to worry, sir. I should have been more aware of my surroundings." Harry carried the plates and utensils over to the table while Snape levitated the dish of peas and the shepard's pie.

The three wizards ate in silence for several minutes until Severus complimented Harry on the meal. Blushing slightly, Harry thanked his professor although he kept his eyes firmly on his plate.

"Sir, I was planning on brewing some Dreamless Sleep this evening. I was running low before but now that I haven't got my things, I though maybe I could brew some here. It would give you a chance to judge my brewing." Harry looked at Snape uncertainly.

Severus watched Harry fidget and shuffle in his seat as he asked. His son was afraid of him, not that he expected much else so early in the game. Although Severus had planned to tell Harry more about his mother this evening, Severus had no problem watching Harry brew. The implication that his son was using Dreamless Sleep over a prolonged period however, concerned him.

"We can brew the potion this evening. If you would tell me, though, how often are you taking Dreamless sleep?"

Severus watched Harry shift nervously and clearly debate with himself whether to tell the truth. "I take it most weeknights. I need to have enough sleep if I'm to make it through lessons. In the summer though, I take it ever night. I can't afford to wake up the Dursley's with a nightmare." Harry colored in shame and kept his eye cast down towards his hand that were resting in his lap.

Severus felt his heart sink. His son could essentially not sleep unless his dreams were suppressed. Looking over at Harry, Severus asked "You realize that prolonged use of Dreamless Sleep can lead to an inability to dream at all? While that's not exactly dangerous, the loss of your dreams is permanent once it occurs."

Harry met his professor's gaze. "I know, sir. I'm actually waiting for the day when my dreams stop. It will save me the effort of brewing so much Dreamless Sleep." Harry's eyes held a challenge. He was practically daring Snape to tell him to stop taking the draught. While the potion itself was not exactly addicting, the peace that a dreamless sleep brought to Harry was.

Clearing his throat and bowing to his son's implied demand, Severus agreed to watch his son make the draught. "Until we can purchase fresh ingredients, you may use what you need from my personal stores." Harry looked surprised at the rare show to kindness from Snape but didn't question it as long as he was getting his way.

* * *

Severus sat on a stool in the corner of his basement potions lab so that he could watch his son without making him nervous. Well, more nervous. Harry had gathered his ingredients and set up his cauldron. Now was the moment of truth, he would now get to see Harry's skills with an unbiased eye—or at least unbiased in the sense that he would be viewing his son's skills as they truely were. Hopefully he could remain fair. He didn't want to view Harry's skills as better then they really were either. He knew Harry would resent him for false flattery. Besides, it could be dangerous if Harry was overconfident in his brewing.

Harry carefully sliced his valerian root into even strips before gently adding them to his potions base. Next, he grabbed the mortar and pestle from the beneath his worktop and cautiously ground his lavender sprigs into an even pulp. He stirred his potion in a slow figure eight motion for three minutes before allowing it to simmer for four and a half minutes. In that time, he diced the wormwood into small even cubes and sprinkled them into the cauldron. His least favourite ingredient, the flobberworm mucus came next. Crushing his poppy pods with the pestle into a rough grain, he added it to his potion and watched as the liquid turned from a mercurial silver to a dusky midnight blue. Finally, Harry added his perfectly powdered asphodel and juiced sopophorus bean to the mixture and stirred his potion until it was a perfect purple, just as it was meant to be.

Severus was impressed. Obviously Harry had made this potion quite a bit as he had brewed a perfect draught without even referring to a recipe. Moving closer to the cauldron, Severus was both thrilled and saddened by his son's perfect potion. Thrilled that his son could brew so well but saddened that traumatic dreams had driven him to such success. Severus was also saddened to realize that he had wasted so much time with his son. While he agreed that Harry would never be a master, his son was still quite skilled and could have benefitted from his potions class had Severus not alienated him from the very start. Sighing, Severus turned to his son.

"This is very well brewed. Indeed, if you had made this in a classroom setting it would have received top marks. I feel I will be doing this quite often, but I must tell you again how sorry I am. Next term, I hope you produce potions that showcase your true abilities. I want you to know that despite my actions in the past, I will grade you fairly come September."

"I look forward to that, sir. If you grade me as I deserve, I will put in the effort to brew to my best very best. Though not my life's calling, I can easily admit that potions is a very useful class. This past year as I furthered my private study, I realized how much time I had wasted at Hogwarts in terms of my education."

Severus tried not to feel upset that his son still referred to him as 'professor' or 'sir'. Hoping that the pleasant evening may have put his son at ease, even if just a little, Severus decided to take a chance.

"I know that we are only just starting fresh and getting to know each other, but you may call me Severus while we are here. Only in class will I ask you to refer to me as professor."

Hoping he hadn't pushed too far too soon, Severus waited on bated breath for his son's response.

Harry studied his potion's professor carefully. He certainly didn't trust the man but even he could see that Snape was trying. As they would be spending the summer together, Harry figured he could humor the man. Calling him Severus wasn't much to ask after all.

"Alright Severus. I can do that." His professo—his father's, name felt foreign on his tongue but Harry figured he'd become accustom to addressing his once most hated professor by his given name in time. Beside, after surviving a year with Umbridge, Harry considered Snape a very distant second for most hated professor. In fact, it was more of a strong dislike he felt for Snape than true hatred.

* * *

That night after Harry had retired to his room, Severus approached Remus about his plans for the next day. He found his old friend sitting in the library with a book propped in his lap but staring into the fire.

"Remus, are you alright?" Severus knew that despite the recent revelations regarding Harry as his son to occupy him, his friend was still mourning his lover. Harry was still mourning the mutt for that matter.

Remus slowly turned to look at Severus. Seeing genuine concern in his eyes, Remus decided to answer truthfully.

"I miss him. After being separated for twelve years while he rotted away in Azkaban, I thought we would finally have time to be together. It's hard knowing how little time we had despite how much I loved him." Remus turned back to the fire as Severus made his way to the other armchair positioned next to the one Remus occupied.

"I know how much he meant to you. He meant a lot to my son as well but you had decades with him to form a bond with your mate while my son was only just beginning to form one. I wish had any words of comfort for you, even if it meant saying something positive about Black." Severus said this with a touch of humor. Despite how much he hated Black, even he would not insult the man in front of Remus. Or Harry.

Remus gave a wet chuckle, holding back tears. He knew how much Severus loathed Sirius. Sirius had never given Severus a reason to see him as anything but an arrogant bully. Remus knew who Sirius was under all the bluster and drama he presented to the world. Sirius was insecure and deeply wounded by his upbringing. Despite his emotional scars and limitations, Sirius made sure that Remus knew that he was the shining star at the center of Sirius' world. Remus still felt deeply guilty for thinking that Sirius could have betrayed Lily and James. Sirius had forgiven him though, and much like Severus must have felt with Remus forgave him, Remus did not feel he deserved forgiveness but was happy that Sirius had forgiven him all the same.

Remus was draw out of his thoughts by Severus. Looking over at the man, Remus waited for him to say what he needed to.

"I came to ask you a favor. It really a favor for Harry, not for me. In our haste to leave though heinous muggles, we neglected to gather Harry's belongings. I was hoping you could go and retrieve them. I don't trust myself to return to that house without landing myself in Azkaban. I would be of no use to my son there."

"Of course! How could I have forgotten? I'll retrieve Harry's things tomorrow morning. I'll likely struggle not to hurt those monsters myself but I see why you cannot go."

"I don't want to leave Harry and have him feel as though I don't have time for him but I also don't want to bring him anywhere near that house again. I don't see any reason why I can't keep him out of Surrey entirely for the rest of his life. When you return from the muggles' I thought we could all go shopping. Harry needs clothing that fits and that wasn't worn by anyone else. I don't want my son in other people's castoffs like I was forced to wear as a child."

Remus looked over at Severus and couldn't help but reach over and rest his hand on the man's arm. Looking the potions master in the eye, Remus said "You are a good man Severus Snape. Let Harry see that and he will eventually come to see you as his father."

Severus felt tears gathering in his eyes at his friend's words. Severus only prayed that he could earn the trust and forgiveness that Remus had shown him one day. Standing from his chair before he actually started to cry, Severus bid Remus good night and quickly left the library.


	7. Morning Calls

Harry lay in the bed he'd been using upstairs staring at the ceiling. What a busy few days. Between the Dursley's and this new development with Snape, he really hadn't had a chance to process everything that had happened.

Harry figured he'd start at the beginning. Sirius. It was a tricky subject. Sure, he missed his godfather desperately, but as much as he missed him, Harry realized that what he truly missed was the _idea_ of a godfather. _Just like you miss the idea of parents_ Harry thought to himself. Sirius had been a chance. Although the fact that Sirius never thought to consider why a 13 year old would immediately agree to live with a man he had thought was a mass murderer and responsible for the death of his parents only hours before should have been a tip off that he wasn't guardian material. _I was desperate. Anyone would have been better than the Dursleys. I offered to live on the run with him for Merlin's sake!_ Adults had always been a disappointment to him though.

Harry then had to deal with the fact that his secret was out. As much as he had always dreamed of having some long lost relative come save him from his personal hell at the Dursleys, Snape wasn't exactly what he had in mind. _I guess this is one of those cases of being careful what you wish for_. Even in scenarios he'd imagined as a child, Harry had never anticipated all of his secrets coming to light. In his imaginings, his savior had always noticed something was wrong and whisked him away from his life in Surrey. This savior knew _something_ was wrong at the Dursleys but never the exact details. It was a little naïve really. Harry knew that people can't just gain custody for no reason and that anyone who could save him would have needed proof of his treatment at the Dursleys. _Adults always need proof. It's never enough to just say that you don't want to return to your family. All those stupid kids that threaten to run away from home when they don't get their way. They ruin it for those of us who really do need to get out._

Adults had never believed him. In Surrey he was considered a delinquent because naturally if Petunia and Vernon Dursley say he is it must be true. Anyone with eyes should have seen how they treated him. His underfed physique, his dirty and monstrous clothes, the glares and cuffs sent his way. In the wizarding world, only Dumbledore knew the true details of his living arrangements. Anyone else who could have helped always deferred to Dumbledore's orders. That blood protection was worth so much more than Harry himself would ever be.

That was all in the past however. What ifs were never of any use to Harry. Thinking of Sirius and his misbegotten childhood didn't solve anything now. Harry had done what he thought was right with the information he had at the time. Had anyone taken the time to explain anything to Harry, the night at the Department of Mysteries could have happened much differently.

Harry knew his occlumency was as good as it would ever be. He could keep his true secrets hidden while pushing forth a smoke screen of lesser memories that were just important enough to convince an invader that they we seeing the whole truth. Between Dumbledore and Sirius, his parents had left him completely unprotected. Was there a will? They were in a war, they must have listed more than Sirius as a possible guardian as he was a frontline fighter just like they were. Where was Godric's Hallow anyway? If the things other told him could be believed, then James was from an old pureblood family. Is Godric's Hallow the Potter family manor? Merlin knew Harry had heard Malfoy boast about his family's manor more than enough so the Potter's must have a manor as well. Was the fidelus charm the only protection? Surely an old family manor would have centuries worth of wards and defenses. Harry could only hear the last minutes before his parents' death. When James had shouted for Lily to run, that Voldemort was at Godric's Hallow, what had Voldemort encountered before reaching them. Surely James and Lily couldn't have been foolish enough to put all of their trust and the protection of not only themselves but also their defenseless newborn son into the hands of a single person. A person who, even before the truth with Sirius was revealed, was described as being average at best. Harry just couldn't fathom it.

All of this led him to Snape. Who would have thought that Snape of all people would have acknowledged him as his son, let alone taken him in for the summer? This new 'parental' Snape was off-putting. He was completely different from the Snape that Harry had known since first year and therefore unpredictable. So far he had been perfectly pleasant, even nice at times. Nice was not a word one thinks of to describe Snape but Harry was quickly coming to find that all of the things he 'knew' about himself and others were completely unfounded after that day in the kitchen with the water cracker box. After all, if he wasn't the son of James Potter like he'd thought, then maybe other people are totally different than he supposed. Things smelled fishy whenever Harry reflected on Dumbledore's actions. If Dumbledore wasn't the paragon of all that is good and light, then that meant that everyone else existed in the same shades of gray that Dumbledore did.

It all came back to Dumbledore after all. Harry doubted Dumbledore had any truly malicious intentions when he stepped into the roll of ringmaster to the circus that is Harry's life. More likely, Dumbledore was sought for his opinion on everything and did what he thought was best, especially if it served the 'greater good' and the light. No, Harry blamed his current predicament on himself for never asking questions in the past, on his parents—James and his mum, that is—for not ensuring his care in the event of their death, and the adults in his life for systematically failing him.

Snape wanted to be a true father to Harry? Well that worked just fine for him. Since every other adult had denied Harry his wizarding heritage and answers to his questions, then Snape would just have to be the one to bear the brunt of 15 years of failures. In the morning, Harry would owl Gringotts and ask if they had information for him regarding the Potter account and will. Now that he thought about it, Harry wasn't even sure how much money was in his vault. He would have to remember to ask about having statements sent to him. After he owled his letter, maybe he would be able to get some information out of Remus. He wanted to spend more time with his old professor anyway. They were all that was left of the Marauders after all.

When Harry woke up the next morning, he immediately realized a flaw in his plan. How was he to send a letter to Gringotts without Hedwig or any parchment? On further consideration, Harry decided to try and find Remus and ask about his things. The worst that could happen was that he'd be forced to ask Snape instead.

Harry descended the stairs and entered the kitchen. He planned to make up breakfast for his professors and then wait for Remus or Snape to turn up so he could find out where his belongings were. Upon entering the kitchen, Harry found it to be blessedly empty. He began preparing breakfast like he had many times before. He fell into a mindless state, preparing the food without focus. He prepped eggs, bacon, and toast. He absently noted that the kitchen needed to be restocked. Maybe if the right opportunity presented itself, he would mention it to his professors.

Harry had just set the table with heaping platters of eggs and bacon as well as a smaller rack of toast when he turned to the sink to start rinsing the pans and skillet. As he turned, he saw the basement door open and Snape emerge. Snape seemed to be in a relatively pleasant mood so Harry thought he'd ask about groceries.

Harry saw Snape's gaze sweep from the stove and sink and over to the table. Harry figured he'd ask before Snape started eating and was thus interrupted and Harry forced to go without a meal for irritating Snape.

"When I was making breakfast I noticed the kitchen could use a restock," Harry ventured nervously.

Snape had just taken his seat when he looked at the amount of food on the table before responding, "If this is how much food you plan on making for every meal, I suspect we'll be restocking groceries quite often."

At this, Harry looked at the breakfast he'd made. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. It was the same breakfast he'd made for the Dursley's many times. Obviously something was wrong with it though. Maybe the food choice? Perhaps he should have made a different selection and thus all the food currently prepared would go to waste. Harry was never to waste food. It was a rule to be followed nearly above all others. Looking over at Snape, confusion and distress clear in his eyes, Harry began to panic. "I can make something else!" Springing from his seat like his chair had caught fire, Harry raced to the cupboards. "Let's see, I have the ingredients for pancakes or French toast," Harry moved to a different cupboard, continuing "I could make porridge but there's only honey, we'd need to go shopping if you want a different flavor—"

"Harry! Slow down!" Snape stood from the table and approached Harry at the counter who had spun around at the sound of his name. "The breakfast you prepared is perfectly adequate. I was merely commenting on the quantity. There is enough food on he table to satisfy a quidditch team. It's only Remus, you, and myself here Harry. Surely you see that we couldn't possibly eat that much."

Snape watched first in shock, then in amusement, and finally in sadness as his son dart from cupboard to cupboard rattling off breakfast foods. The kitchen table was practically groaning under the weight of so much bacon and eggs.

Once Severus managed to get Harry's attention, he heard his son mumble something about his relatives and asked him to speak up.

Harry looked anywhere but at Severus when he responded. "I've always made that much at my relatives." It was still said softly but Severus was satisfied that Harry had repeated himself at all.

"Well, as neither you, Remus, or myself are trying to eat ourselves into an early grave, nor are we taking up competitive eating in this household, I think in the future this much food will not be necessary." Severus watched as Harry blushed slightly and then moved to take at seat at the table.

Severus also sat down and it did not escape his notice that Harry only reached for food once Severus had served himself. Deciding that it wasn't the most important quirk of his son's to address, Severus remained silent.

After a few minutes of semi-comfortable silence, Remus joined the father and son at the table. "Well this is certainly a full breakfast." Remus looked over at Harry who once again colored slightly. "I think only Sirius would be able to eat this much."

Harry flinched at the mention of his godfather and waited for Remus to comment on how Harry was party to the death of his mate.

"We can still talk about him Harry," Remus began. Harry couldn't look at Remus. He knew he wasn't solely to blame for what happened that night, but he knew he should have handled the situation differently. He was startled out of his thoughts when Remus gently turned his head to face him. Panicked about the anger and disappointment he would no doubt see in the face of the last Marauder, Harry relied on an old standby for dealing with angry adults. Apologize for everything and anything he can think of in the hopes of a lesser punishment.

"I'm sorry about that night Remus! Really, I know I did all the wrong things! I'm so sorry! I should have remembered the mirror for contacting Sirius or else thought to find Snape and not shout nonsense at him after I'd broken into Umbridge's office. I knew it was stupid but it was also a form of revenge against what she'd done to us all! How could I know she would use the cruciatus? I've been trying so hard to study and be better prepared to face Voldemort but it's not enough! Now Sirius is dead and you'll never forgive me!"

Harry had worked himself up into quite a state at this point and didn't notice the shock and fury on the faces of his professors at the mention of Umbridge. All he knew was that suddenly it was very hard to breathe. He felt strong arms wrap around him and began to struggle. It was several long minutes before Harry heard a deep timber instructing him to match his breathing to the person holding him. Slowly, Harry came back to himself and saw Remus crouched in front of him with worried eyes. _How did we all end up on the floor? Idiot! Focus Harry! If Remus is in front of me then who is holding me? Snape!_ Harry stiffened but didn't try to struggle lest he irritate his professor into hurting him.

"Harry," Remus said slowly drawing Harry's attention once more. "What do you mean she used the cruciatus curse? Had she used it before? Is that what you meant by 'what she had done to you all'?"

"No, you know what she did." Here Harry had turned to try and see Snape. "All the professors knew about her detentions. McGonagall just told me to keep my head down." Seeing the blank looks on both men's faces, Harry figured he'd jogged their memories and continued onto the tale of how he had ended up at the end of Umbridge's wand. "So after Snape—Severus, sorry sir—left Umbridge's office, she was still demanding to know who I had been speaking with in the floo. When I wouldn't say, she used the curse hoping to make me talk. Thankfully Hermione was quick to think of an escape. We lead Umbridge into the Forbidden Forest telling her we had spoken to Dumbledore and that the weapon was hidden there. We made as much noise as possible and when the centaurs heard us, she insulted them and then they hauled her off. They weren't particular happy with Hermione and I either but Umbridge was their focus once she started shouting about halfbreeds."

"No Harry, you misunderstand me. We don't know about the detentions. We knew they were happening but none of the staff could find out what went on in them," Remus corrected.

"NO ONE COULD FIND OUT? NO ONE COULD FIND OUT?! NO ONE WANTED TO FIND OUT! IT WAS EASIER FOR YOU NOT TO KNOW! I WENT TO PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL AND ALL SHE DID WAS TELL ME TO BE A GOOD BOY AND KEEP MY HEAD DOWN! I KNOW THE STAFF WAS LIMITED BY UMBRIDGE LIKE THE STUDENTS WERE BUT NONE OF THE STAFF HELPED US AT ALL! Hermione was the one who helped me in the end! Just like always, we had to figure everything out ourselves." Harry slowly ran out of steam during his rant, once again exhausted by the realities of his life. Standing from Snape's hold, Harry turned and faced his two professors. "It was a blood quill. She had us doing lines with a blood quill. You can trust me on that," Harry stretched out his hand towards the professors, "as you can see, I must not tell lies."

Harry looked at the gobsmacked faces of his professors and decided a subject change was needed. He was done revealing secret for the day as far as he was concerned. Addressing Remus, Harry decided to get to the bottom of where his belongings were. When Snape informed him that his belongings had been left behind at Privet Drive, Harry sighed knowing that the contents of his trunk would likely be destroyed. "If they haven't burnt my trunk, I'd like it back. If not though, my most important belongings are shrunken in my school bag under the floorboards beneath the bed in Dudley's second bedroom."

Severus watched in shock and then sad understanding as his son began having a panic attack at the mention of Black. It was too soon after the scare over making the wrong breakfast for Harry to be able to handle it.

When Harry slid out of his chair and was crouched on all fours trying to breathe, Severus got up and embraced Harry from behind. Sitting down on the floor with Harry's back pressed to his chest, Severus began to slowly instruct Harry to match his breathing to Severus' own exaggerated breaths. Severus was thrilled that he was able to comfort his son. He had missed out on Harry's whole life and treated him so poorly that any chance to comfort Harry or connect with him was going to be cherished by the potions master. He continued speaking to his son in a calm, soothing tone until Harry's breathing evened out. All the while, his mind was racing over what his son had just babbled at them. What did he mean about the cruciatus, and what had Umbridge done to them? He knew Harry had served an above average number of detentions with the detestable woman but as far as he could tell, all he'd done is write lines.

Severus was brought back to the moment when he felt Harry stiffen in his arms while Remus asked him to clarify what he'd meant. Harry's tale did nothing to quell his concern and in fact changed that concern to fury when he heard what that intolerant toad of a woman had done to his son and his students. It took all of Snape's not inconsiderable self-control not to jump as Harry began yelling, and really, he couldn't blame his son for being angry. Apparently he had failed his son and his student's worse than he could have imagined. Knowledge of what his son had suffered this past year only added to his shame and remorse over how he had treated his son in the past, particularly during occlumency lessons.

Severus was forced to release Harry was he stood up and turned to face Remus and himself, thrusting his hand at them. Severus saw deep, jagged words etched into his son's skin. He held his son's gaze for several long moments before Harry turned to Remus and asked about his things. Taking the opportunity to get the day moving, Severus cut in and started to tell Harry what he had planned for their day.

"Remus has agreed to go pick up your belongings from Surrey. We realized last night that we had left them behind but decided to wait until this morning to reclaim your things. When Remus returns, I thought we could all go shopping for clothes for you. I can see that your relatives did not see fit to cloth you in items of your own and I wish to rectify that. I also thought we could look for furnishings and decorations for the house."

"Maybe while Remus gets my things, you and I can go grocery shopping," Harry suggested tentatively.

Severus was thrilled that Harry suggested spending time alone together. Quickly agreeing, the three wizards agreed to meet back at Spinner's end in an hour and a half before Remus apparated away and Severus and Harry walked out the front door.


	8. The Ghost of a Good Thing

_AN: Really quick, I just wanted to say sorry for blowing up everyone's email with new chapter alerts when it was just me doing some format edits. Also, I added warnings about the child abuse and rape. I should have thought of that before, I've certainly read enough of these things to know to post warnings. So, my sincere apologies to anyone I upset/triggered/offended. Anyway, ON WITH THE STORY!_

Remus returned with Harry's belongings just as he and Severus finished unloading the groceries. Harry was thrilled to see Remus carrying his school bag and his trunk. So they hadn't burned his things in the end. They were perhaps busy dealing with Vernon's violent castration. Harry couldn't find it in himself to care. Vernon had tried his best to break him but ended up broken himself in the end.

Harry may never have fought back himself, but short of revealing his secret, no adult would have removed him from the Dursley's care so he didn't see the benefit of angering his relatives any more than his mere existence did in the first place. As it was, he survived the Dursley's dubious care against all odds, and at least for right now, only two other people knew the truth of what happened in that house. Unfortunately, Severus knew in significantly more detail than Remus as his honourary godfather hadn't used legilimency on his aunt and uncle.

Pulling his mind from that depressing chain of thoughts, Harry took his trunk of Remus and began sorting through the contents so he could decide what he'd need to buy. First thing was first though, Harry needed to confirm that he'd never return to the Dursley's again.

"You can guarantee that I won't have to return to Privet Drive right?"

Remus shared a look with Severus before Severus responded. "I would not allow you back there even if it meant going into hiding over the summers."

"Brilliant, no sense in buy new clothes if I was going back to the Dursley's. They would have just taken them from me. It's why I've never bothered buying new clothing before besides pants. Dudley's oversized boxers was where I drew the line."

Remus had always wondered why Harry never purchased new clothing aside from his school uniform. He figured even if Harry hadn't liked standard wizarding wear that he would at least have purchased new muggle clothes. Unlike Severus, he had been to Privet Drive before the rescue. He knew that the Dursley's had plenty of money to provide clothes that fit Harry even if they would had insisted on buying his things second hand out of spite. Considering how obsessive the Dursley's were about their image, it was hard to imagine that they would allow a child that the community knew was in their care attend school in oversized, dirty, ripped hand-me-down clothes.

Severus again began to berate himself for never seeing the signs. As a poor and abused child himself, the fact that he had not noticed the raggedy clothing and half starved look that Harry arrived with at Hogwarts every year should have been a blaring neon sign that the child needed help. So blinded he had been by the past and his own bitter hatred that he'd allowed the abuse to continue for five years after meeting his son. He would make up for his actions to his son if it was the last thing he ever did. With this in mind, Severus began planning all the things he wanted to get for his son while they were shopping. Clothes, books, grooming supplies, the list was growing quite long when Harry spoke again.

Harry watched his professors both become lost in thought and couldn't figure out what could be so distracting at the moment. Deciding to get the ball rolling, Harry decided to see about visiting Gringotts as well as shopping. He wasn't sure if they meant to take him to Diagon Alley or stay in the muggle world.

"If it's possible, can we go to Gringotts today while we're out shopping? I haven't been since the summer before third year so I'd like to see how much I have left."

Severus was surprised and upset for his son. "Harry, what do you mean how much you have left? The Potter fortune surpasses even that of the Malfoy's if the rumors can be believed. Even if you somehow managed to blow through your trust vault, which seems highly unlikely, you still will inherit the Potter fortune upon coming of age. You will also inherit the Prince fortune upon my death. Have you never opened any of your statements?"

Harry just gave Snape a blank look. "Statements? I've never received any mail from Gringotts."

Remus could see Harry was confused and becoming upset and Severus looked like he was about to find out who was responsible and torture them. Deciding to nip it in the bud, Remus suggested they make Gringotts their first stop to get everything sorted out.

Harry walked though the front doors of Gringotts with Remus to his left and Snape on his right. He nodded politely to the goblins holding guarding the doors and quickly approached the Griphook who he saw working at the last queue.

"Hey Griphook. I was wondering if there was anyone I could talk to about the Potter account. I didn't know that the vault you took me to back on my first visit was only my trust vault. I've never gotten any statements you see. Also, do you know if my parents' will was stored here or at the ministry?"

"It is always a pleasure to see you Mr. Potter. I will escort you to see the bank director and he will be able to answer all your questions. It is most unusual that you have not received any of our correspondence since entering the wizarding world. I'm sure Ragnok will be interested in solving this issue."

"Thank you Griphook. Maybe you can escort us down to my vault once we finish speaking with Ragnok."

"It would be my pleasure Mr. Potter."

Severus stood there stunned as he watched his son chat with a goblin like they were old friends. No one was treated so casually by the goblins, all any wizard ever received from the goblins was sneers and sharp commands. A few days ago, he would have grumbled and sneered at even the goblins bowing at the feet of _The Great Harry Potter_ , the Boy Who Lived. Now, Severus could see that it wasn't Harry's Boy Who Lived status that made people love him, it was just Harry.

The three wizards followed Griphook down a twisting hallway deep into the bank. An ornate wooden door was at the end of the hall. Griphook knocked sharply on the door once and then led the wizards into the bank director's office.

Harry saw a goblin sitting behind the desk who looked much older than Griphook. This goblin was clearly Ragnok. He had an air about him that demanded respect and obedience. He was richly dressed for a goblin, which clearly denoted his importance in the goblin nation.

Harry waited to be addressed so that he had the least chance of offending Ragnok before they even began the meeting.

"Have a seat Mr. Potter. Will your companions be staying?"

"Thank you sir for agreeing to see me on such short notice. As for my companions, I'd like them to stay if that's allowed," Harry asked tentatively. He certainly wasn't about to start making demands to the director of the entire bank. "They will both likely be assisting me with my account so they might as well hear the information at the same time I do so it doesn't need to be repeated again."

"They may stay. You are of course correct that they should hear this information if they are to assist you. After all, wasted time is wasted money." Ragnok probably thought he was smiling although the face he was making was terrifying rather than friendly. Harry shuddered and decided not to tell Ragnok that his smile was incredibly creepy and that he should avoid smiling at all costs in the future.

Harry sat in the middle chair in front of Ragnok's desk with his professors on either side. He watched Ragnok place a large file on his desk along with an ornate box, which appeared not to have any seam where it opened. It also has a groove about three inches long by a half-inch wide on the top surface. Harry waited for Ragnok to tell him what to do. This was his first bank meeting in either the wizarding or the muggle world so he didn't know what to expect.

"Mr. Potter, before me are the documents pertaining to the Potter family account as well as the Potter family rings. You will place seven drops blood into the grove atop this box and, if you are accepted by the family magic, will be able to retrieve the ring worn by the Potter Head of House. There will also he an Heir Ring inside, but as that is not going to be needed for many years to come, you will leave it in the box and it shall be stored in the family vault until such a time that your heir turns the age of eleven."

Harry scooted to the edge of his seat and closer to the box. He then looked over at Remus realizing he had no way of pricking his finger. Remus cast a mild cutting hex on the tip of Harry's finger and once Harry had allowed seven drops of blood to fall into the groove, quickly healed it. After all, blood is a dangerous thing in the wizarding world. Harry didn't want any extra drops of his blood accidentally allowing Voldemort's long lost lover to regain a body or something like that.

Harry watched as the top of the box melted away leaving a perfectly smooth ovular opening in the top of the box. Inside were two very ornate rings, one more so than the other. The Head of House Ring was a large gold piece with a flat top that had the Potter Crest etched into it. Harry carefully reached out and placed the ring on the middle finger of his left hand. It shrunk down to fit his skeletal finger. Harry felt a rush of magic flow through him and then settle.

"The Head of House Ring, Mr. Potter, has many benefits. First, when you press your family crest into wax, in imbues what you have written with your magical signature so that those who receive it know it is authentic. You can give orders and make purchases via house elf though this. Second, the ring will repel minor curses and jinxes cast near your person. Finally, if you are about to consume something poisoned or tampered with, the ring with heat up to alert you of this danger. Any questions so far?

"No sir, you may continue." Harry in fact had many questions however he was so overwhelmed that he couldn't even think of a question that would make all of this anymore clear. Hopefully Remus or Snape could help him with this later.

"Very well. As for your family account, there are several things, which may be of interest to you. First, I have for you to review the list of properties that you own under the Potter name. Though we goblins stay out of wizarding affairs, we are not unaware of the current goings-on. You may find that you will have superior security in one of the Potter properties. As a member of the Potter bloodline, particularly as the Head of House, the wards around these properties will offer you almost unrivaled protection that have been strengthen over the centuries by the blood and magic of your ancestors."

Harry gazed down at the list and realized two things very quickly. Both of which made him furious. The first thing he noticed, was that Godric's Hallow was _not_ the family seat. In fact, the family manor was Stinchcombe Hall in Shropshire. The second thing Harry discovered, was that Godric's Hallow wasn't even a family home. At least not in the sense that it belonged to the Potter bloodline or the main line of the Potter family. In fact, it belonged to the Peverells, and had been gifted to the Potter's as a bride price many generations ago. _Lovely. Just lovely!_ Harry fumed to himself. _So my parents, in their infinite wisdom, decided that hiding in the centuries old family manor just wouldn't do. No! Let's hide in a small cottage that doesn't even fully respond to our family's blood and magic! Brilliant! No wonder I was such an idiot when I made it to the wizarding world. It must be genetic. At least when_ _ **I**_ _realized Voldemort was alive and ready to kill me I got smart and started to study and try to protect myself._ Harry couldn't believe it. His parents really had left their protect in the hands of a single mediocre wizard. At this point, Harry doubted any arrangements were made at all for his care in the event of their demise. He didn't doubt for a moment that his parents loved him, but even though they had grown up in wartime, they hadn't matured enough to think of the realities of war. They were twenty-one when they died and though six years older than Harry was when he decided to get smart and start preparing, they were still quite young and didn't have the personal experience with dark lords or his followers that Harry had since entering the wizarding world at age eleven.

"Sir, what has become of these properties? Other than Godric's Hallow, which I assume no long stands, Stinchcombe Hall and these holiday houses have sat empty and abandoned for decades. Are there any houses left?"

"I forgot, Mr. Potter, that you were not raised in the wizarding world. Godric's Hallow is now what you might call a national monument. Have you never been? Your parents are buried in the town cemetery. Anyway, when your father died, all vaults and houses went into immediate lock down. The vaults cannot be accessed by anyone but a wizard of Potter blood. Money can be added to these vaults, but no money, heirlooms, or valuables can be removed. The houses are much the same. While in lockdown, house elves in your family's service maintain the exterior of the manor but a special type of preservation charm protects the interior. Not only does this protect the integrity of the furniture and belongings within, it also prevents wizards who previously had access to the house from looting or damaging anything within. When you choose to return to these properties, it will be as if they were never empty."

"Would I be able to access any of them now? Or do I need to wait until I am seventeen?"

"In ordinary circumstances, you would still be under the care of a relative even though your parents are deceased. That relative would share Potter blood and therefore be able to access these properties. As your parents were the last of the Potter line and you had no blood family left, you gain access to these properties at age thirteen. You were informed of this in the statement you received for July, 1993. However, you will have to come of age before gaining full access to the main family vaults, which contain the bulk of the family fortune as well as the family artifacts and heirlooms, and be of age to be eligible to take up your seats in the Hogwarts Board of Governors and the Wizengamot."

Harry sat there in stunned silence trying to take it all in. One point however reminded him of one of his reasons for coming to Gringotts today.

"Sir, I have never received any sort of statement, correspondence, or letter of any sort for Gringotts since I discovered the bank's existence at age eleven when I first was informed of the wizarding world. To whom have you sent my statements?"

Ragnok looked surprised then angry. Rifling through the Potter file, Ragnok growled under his breath and then raised his head to address Harry. "It appears, Mr. Potter, that your headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, has been receiving all your statements as your magical guardian. Am I to understand he never informed you of this nor shared them with you?"

"No sir. He has sort of handled my magical guardianship since my godfather was in Azkaban shortly after my parents were killed but we never discuss anything except where I live for the summer. Did my parents' will indicate that Professor Dumbledore was to be my magical guardian?"

Sorting through his file once more, Ragnok removed the Last Will and Testament of James Potter and Lily Evans Potter and handed it to Harry. Harry quickly scanned the document and saw that, other than leaving all their worldly possessions to their son with the exception of 10,000 galleons to be given to Remus John Lupin, the Potters had not indicated anything else should be done. Harry numbly handed the will off to Remus. Harry's thoughts were in turmoil. No guardians were list for Harry. No personal letters to their son. All Harry had was a cracker box of old letters and photos. He couldn't believe it.

Harry didn't know whether to scream in fury or cry in despair. Not only did he have multiple homes and a vast fortune, he also had a seat in the wizarding government and at his school. For a boy who grew up in a cupboard wearing rags, it was a little much to deal with all at once. He also had two parents who were nearly negligent in their stupidity while setting their affairs in order in the event of their deaths. He had a fortune and a title, how could they have not thought to plan for that? How could no one have told him what it meant to be the Heir to the Potter line? Even if Dumbledore was known for withholding vital information, as purebloods, Ron or even Neville should have told him right? Is it possible they didn't know either? Harry just wanted to get the shopping over with so he could go back to Snape's and be alone to sort out how he felt.

Severus sat in amusement watching his son receive a smile for the goblin manager. In Harry's defense, it was incredibly off-putting so his reaction wasn't that surprising. Severus wasn't even certain he knew of a wizard in living memory who had seen a goblin smile. Perhaps they died in fright before they could spread the news.

Severus was happy to learn that his son would be protected by his ring. Anything that could protect Harry was something that Severus fully supported. Severus could only be so many places at once. Protecting Harry would be easier now that he was getting to know the boy, but a strong protective ring forged with old family magics was a welcome addition to Harry's defenses. He became concerned when Harry turned white and then red while reading over his list of properties. Severus was dying to know what upset his son so that he could comfort him but sensed Harry would not appreciate it at this moment. Severus was continually struck by his change of feelings towards Harry. Though his previous assumptions about the boy were wildly wrong, it was still surprising that he felt such a strong attachment to him nearly as soon as he discovered that Harry was his son. He decided it was likely to due with just how badly he had wanted children with Lily. More than anything else, it was a child or five that he had dreamed of when he imagined his future with Lily.

Hearing that Harry could access these properties, Severus became intrigued. He wasn't sure if it would over step his bounds, but if he could get Harry to agree, he would take his son and live in one of the family houses. They would have protection that Spinner's End could never gain. Spinner's End was a muggle house in a muggle neighborhood that Severus had enchanted himself with every protection and ward he knew. Though a strong and knowledgeable wizard, Severus could never hope to reach the level of warding on an old pureblood manor. Hoping that his son didn't resent him for doing so, Severus decided that he would ask Ragnok when Harry finished speaking with him if Harry did not do so himself.

Severus was furious with Albus for never telling Harry of his wealth. Even when he had hated the boy, denying Harry his statements would have enraged the potion's master. It was especially infuriating since Harry wouldn't have access to the fortune until he came of age. There was no way for Harry to blow the family fortune before he even left Hogwarts so for the life of him, Severus couldn't imagine why Albus had kept it a secret.

Remus sat stunned after reading the will. He had received 10,000 galleons? Where was it? Having so little money all his life, Remus accounted for every knut when he received or spent money in the wizarding world. He had never had so much money that 10,000 galleons would have gone unnoticed. Remus refused to take charity from anyone but being left money in a will was an entirely different thing. He had not expected any money but if James wanted him to have it then he should have at least been told about regardless of what he chose to do about it.

Remus sat in stunned silence until he heard Harry stop speaking in the background. Deciding to find out what happened to the money, Remus addressed Ragnok.

"Director, I am Remus John Lupin and I have never received 10,000 galleons. Where was the money deposited?"

Ragnok wrote something on a piece of parchment on his desk and then reached into a drawer in his desk, extracting a file. Flipping through the file briefly, Ragnok looked up and addressed the man.

"Mr. Lupin, the money was deposited into your main account. It says here that Mr. Sirius Black set it up for you in 1979. It says here that when his husband came to the bank asking to be seen to his vault that he would know the password to enter. It was all very unusual I grant you, but not unheard of. It is indicated in this file that you are his husband, or his intended at any rate."

With that, Remus lost consciousness and slumped in his chair.


	9. This Ruined Puzzle

Severus watched Remus lose consciousness and decided that shopping could wait for another day. In fact, they could just owl order everything they wanted. Harry could wear some of his clothes shrunken down until the orders arrived. Remus and Harry had both received a lot of shocking information in the past hour and would need time to come to terms with what they had learned.

"Harry, I think we should postpone our shopping trip for today. I'm sure you would like some time to adjust to all you have discovered and Remus is obviously overwhelmed. Before we return to Spinner's End, if you agree that is, I'd like to find out about Stinchcombe Hall. I am perfectly happy to provide for you and I am capable of seeing to your housing, but at this time, your safety is more important than anything else. Stinchcombe Hall would provide unparalleled protections that Spinner's End could never hope to offer. What do you think?"

Harry looked at Severus for several long moments. Whatever he was hoping to find he must have seen because he nodded in agreement.

Turning to Ragnok, Harry asked "I barely even know where Shropshire is, how do we find Stinchcombe Hall?"

"Your list of properties will tell you the name of the head house elf for each residence. Call the elf to you and the elf will provide you with a portkey to the manor gate. From there you must identify yourself to be allowed entry."

"Okay that sounds easy enough. Thank you for meeting with me on such short notice. In the future, I would like a second copy of all correspondence sent directly to me and not just to Professor Dumbledore."

"It will be done, Mr. Potter."

The three wizards arrived at Spinner's End after leaving the bank. Remus immediately retreated into his room while Severus followed Harry into the sitting room. Harry sat down heavily on the couch and stared off into the empty fire grate.

Harry didn't even know what to think. He just sat there with his mind buzzing, not specific though taking precedence over another. It was a lot to take in. The wealth, properties, and seats aside, Harry finally settled on what bothered him the most.

How could his parents, Lily and James that is, have left his future so exposed? He had been 15 months old when they died! He couldn't have been anymore vulnerable! He would have barely been walking or talking at that point. They had listed no guardians, no instructions for his care, nothing! Harry felt his eyes begin to burn as tears gathered. He really did not want to cry in front of Snape but it seemed like an inevitability at this point. He was far too angry and upset to control his emotions.

As tears began to trickle down Harry's cheeks, he sat waiting for Snape to begin taunting him about being a 'fool who wears his heart of his sleeve' and an idiot child. What happened instead was incredibly uncomfortable but pleasant.

Severus sat watching Harry sort through his thoughts and emotions after the tumultuous bank trip. He could see the boy was overwhelmed and unable to settle on which thought or emotion he wanted to deal with first. After several minutes, Severus noticed tears making tracks down his son's cheeks and was torn. While Severus would be the first to admit he wasn't exactly expressive or good with emotions, his son was clearly in pain and he wanted to comfort him.

Deciding to take a risk, Severus reached out and laid his hand on Harry's shoulder. He felt his son flinch and tense but Severus left his hand in place hoping, once Harry realized that he did not mean him any harm, that Harry would draw some comfort from the gesture.

Harry and Severus sat in a slightly uncomfortable silence until finally Harry spoke. "They didn't plan for me at all." Harry remained silent for several long moments after that trying to keep his tears out of his voice. "My mum knew you were my father and even you weren't listed as a possible guardian. No one was listed. They left me at the mercy of the ministry and Dumbledore." Harry couldn't go on. He had drawn such comfort in the past from the idea that his parents loved him and cared for him. Though his feelings towards his da—James, towards James—became more complicated after watching him bully Snape for 'existing' in Snape's memory, Harry had still felt loved and protected by their memory. Now, he was unable to reconcile that feeling of warmth and love with two people who knew they fought on the front lines of a bloody, deadly war and who knew they were marked for death and yet had not even considered laying down at least basic desires for the care and future of their only son and heir.

Severus sighed and debated how to comfort his son. Admittedly, he agreed with Harry. The complete disregard of Harry's future was incomprehensible but as much as he hated James Potter, even Severus couldn't deny that both he and Lily had loved Harry to death. In fact, they literally had loved him until they gave their lives to protect him. Deciding on a course of action, Severus turned to address Harry.

"I wish I had a satisfying answer for how things happened but we both know there isn't one. Lily and James should have planned better for your future care besides assuming you'd live with your godfather, especially considering the death toll during the first war. Azkaban aside, in all likelihood, Sirius would have died fighting in the war if the Dark Lord had survived that Halloween. They planned poorly, I won't deny it. I also won't deny that Lily and James loved you a great deal. They loved you so much that they died trying to protect you. They were twenty-one years old and put their trust in a close family friend. There are endless things that could have been done differently, but they were very young and did the best they could. You have every right to be angry and feel betrayed, but don't think for one moment that you weren't loved."

"They weren't so young," Harry muttered under his breath. "If I knew someone could attack my family, I'd do everything I could to protect them, including leaving them well cared for if I died. I thought of who would get what and started leaving letters written for my friends and family in my trunk so that when Voldemort next attacked me, I could fight knowing that the people I care about aren't left with nothing. I started doing that when I was eleven."

"Harry, I know that for you caring for others and thinking of your own mortality is second nature, but your parents didn't grow up with abusive relatives nor did they have the Dark Lord after them personally. You can't expect them to behave and react as you behave and react. You know how I feel about James Potter and even I can admit he was more mature and took on a more active role in the war than many of our classmates. Be angry by all means, but don't be so hard on them. Besides, even if they did plan poorly for you, someone should have checked on you no matter where you went to live after their deaths."

Harry sat in silence thinking over what Snape had said. He was over the shock of Snape saying something complimentary about James Potter and more focused on what had happened once James and Lily had died.

"You're right," Harry finally admitted. "After all, Dumbledore is the one who left me with the Dursley's. He wouldn't tell anyone where I was and never checked on me himself. He trusted old Ms. Figg to tell him what she saw and in all likelihood, ignored any of her concerns in favor of his beloved blood wards. He's always care for them so much more than he cared for me."

Meanwhile, as Harry and Severus were discussing the visit to Gringotts in the sitting room, Remus was in his bedroom organizing his thoughts. He couldn't believe that Sirius had set up an account for him as his husband nearly twenty years ago. They had talked about getting married of course but between the war and increasingly strict werewolf legislation, Remus hadn't actually consider it something that could become a reality. They'd just been kids then. Nineteen was too young to be married after all. Remus felt tears in his eyes as he thought, _Sirius loved me so much that he'd planned for their future together before he even asked me to marry him_. Remus hoped to Merlin that Sirius knew that he loved him just as much in return.

However it wasn't the money he'd never received or the fact that he'd never known that Sirius considered him his intended until after Sirius had died. No, what really made Remus angry was Albus Percival Wulfric Brian BLOODY Dumbledore! Not only had he left his cub at the mercy of muggles and hadn't bothered to check on him, but on top of that, he had withheld his bank statements and never even taken Harry to visit his parents' graves! There was only one thing to do, he was going to take a page out of Molly Weasley's book and send a howler.

The following morning, the three inhabitants of Spinner's End sat at the kitchen table having just finished breakfast. Severus wanted to plan out everything that needed to be done before they moved to Stinchcombe Hall. While robes, casual clothing, and school supplies could be purchased via owl order, Severus wanted to take Harry back to Diagon Alley one last time to stop at Grosseteste's Ocular. Harry had been wearing the same glasses since he was eleven, likely even longer. Aside from an updated prescription, Severus wanted to get Harry wizarding glasses that repelled water and dirt as well as having an anti-summoning charm. All any wizard would need to do is summon Harry's glasses and he'd be helpless.

"If you agree Harry," Severus began, "I believe moving to Stinchcombe Hall will be our wisest choice. While it is unlikely anyone would think to look for you here, the chance that one of my dark associates would visit me here would put you at an unacceptable level of risk."

"I wouldn't mind moving to Stinchcombe Hall, sir. Besides being safer, I'd like to learn more about my family. All I really know about either of my parents could fit on an index card. I'm hoping there will be portraits or possibly a library where I can find out about the kind of people my family were."

"Very well. Packing what we need from the house should only take a short while. I'd like to leave for Diagon Alley as soon as we can to avoid crowds. While Grosseteste's Ocular is right inside the archway from the Leaky Cauldron, the less time we spend there the better." Turning to Remus, Severus continued "perhaps while I take Harry for new glasses, you can stop into a few shops and get owl order catalogues. That way, we can return here and pack and be at Stinchcombe by tea."

"That won't be a problem Severus. Let's go now, it's only getting later and the crowds will only grow."

Albus Dumbledore was enjoying a quiet morning in his quarters and slowly eating breakfast when the mail arrived. Albus set the Daily Prophet aside and began quickly sorting through his letters. As his attention was directed down towards his mail, he did not notice the howler come through the window attached to a non-descript brown owl. In fact, he only took note of the angry red envelope when it opened, folded itself into an angry mouth, and began shouting abuse at him. Albus was stunned to say the least. The angry voice of the usually calm and quiet Remus Lupin rang through his quarters and down into his office.

"ALBUS _SODDING_ DUMBLEDORE! THE NEXT TIME I SEE YOU NEAR MY CUB I'LL KILL YOU! HOW DARE YOU LEAVE HIM ALONE WITH MUGGLES! HOW DARE YOU NOT CHECK ON HIM AND ENSURE HIS WELLFARE! I WASN'T ALLOWED TO TAKE HIM IN BECAUSE OF MY WEREWOLF STATUS WOULD PUT HIM IN DANGER?! WHAT ABOUT THE DANGER YOU PUT HIM IN?! HE WILL NEVER RETURN TO THAT PLACE AGAIN! I WOULDN'T EVEN LET HIM RETURN TO HOGWARTS FOR RISK OF YOU HARMING HIM FURTHER IF I THOUGHT HE'D ALLOW IT!. MARK MY WORDS ALBUS, I'M KEEPING AN EYE ON YOU NOW! IF I FIND OUT YOU'VE HARMED ONE HAIR ON MY CUB'S HEAD YOU'LL BE SORRY!"

Albus sat there stunned. He couldn't remember the last time he'd received a howler but he was certain they'd become louder and more unsettling since that time. Thinking fast, Albus was able to determine that Severus had contacted Remus for help, that they had removed Harry of Privet Drive, and that he had likely lost any control he might have once had in determining Harry's life. He didn't mean the boy harm. It was just that there was a war going on and he needed to think about the big picture, about the wizarding world at large in addition to the life of a single boy. He'd never meant for things to get so out of hand. What were a few missed meals and an uncaring family compared to staying alive? Albus knew he'd have to get in contact with Remus and Severus to do damage control.

Harry returned from Diagon Alley with a new pair of black square-frame glasses perched on his nose. The world was so much clearer now he almost could believe he had managed with his old pair so long. He liked wizarding glasses far more than muggle glasses. These were charmed to remain on his face unless he himself removed them. They also repelled moisture, dirt, grease, steam, basically anything that could impair his vision. They'd be great for quidditch. It wouldn't matter how foul the weather got, his vision would still be crystal clear. _They'll help in battle too,_ Harry thought quietly to himself. He didn't want to think about the war right now though so he brutally buried those thoughts in the back of his mind. The war was a problem for Future Harry. Right now, all Harry wanted to do was recuperate from the loss of his godfather and the revelation of his home life to Snape and Remus.

Harry walked up to the room he'd been staying in and quickly packed his trunk. Remus had gotten him catalogues from Madam Malkins, Twilfitt & Tattings, Slug's & Jiggers, Flourish & Blotts, Scribbulus Writing Implements, and Wiseacre's Wizarding Equipment. Harry figured that if he couldn't find everything he wanted between all of the catalogues then there was no helping him. Slamming the lid closed on his trunk, Harry dragged it down the steps and left it in the sitting room before head back upstairs to see if Remus needed any help packing.

Remus was in his room packing up the few belongings that had migrated out of his trunk in the short time they had been at Spinner's End. He was nearly finished when he heard a knock at his door. He called for the person to enter and turned to find Harry fidgeting by the door.

"I finished packing, I came to see if you wanted any help." Harry ventured nervously.

"I'm just about done but come in and have a seat. We can just chat until Severus is finished with his packing."

"Oh okay. Remus? I've been thinking a lot about that night," Harry didn't elaborate, he knew there would be no confusion as to which night he referred. "I miss Sirius so much and even if I can admit that what happened wasn't solely my fault, I can't help the guilt that's eating me alive."

"Harry, cub, you have no reason to feel guilty. Sirius is the love of my life and I miss him every second, but with the information you knew and resources you had available, you did the only thing you could. Sirius would have acted the same way if the roles were reversed. Your parents, well Lily and James that is, would have as well."

"That's not exactly what I feel guilty about. I mean yeah I feel guilty that he's dead and that you're alone now and that I have a huge role to play in that chain of events, but that thing I feel worst about is that I think I care more about the _idea_ of him than the actual person. That's pretty selfish, huh? I just want to come first for someone. For once in my life I want an adult to handle things for me and my interests, not what they can get from me."

Remus looked at Harry for several long moments trying to decide how to say what he wanted. He knew that he had to answer just right of Harry would let the guilt consume him. Gathering his thoughts, Remus continued.

"Cub, that doesn't make you a bad person. No hear me out." Remus said as he saw Harry about to protest. "Listen to me. Sirius loved you. We both love you like you're ours. But you only got to know Sirius two years ago. You didn't even get to spend a full year with him like we had together your third year. You saw him sporadically in person and exchanged letters when you could. Harry, you have _no_ reason to feel guilty for wanting an adult to take care of you as they should from the very beginning. I count myself among the adults who have let you down. Things will be different now. I won't let anyone drive me from your side over my curse. Not Dumbledore and not the Ministry. You've got Severus now too. I know nothing he's ever done has led you to believe he's anything but a heartless git, but he's incredibly loyal and tender-hearted. He just has to let his walls down before anyone sees it. And he _will_ let you see it. He's already begun. Just give it a chance."

"I'll try. I'm just afraid to trust him." Harry whispered, practically to himself.

Severus didn't really have all that much to pack. He had brought some of his potions supplies home with him for the summer but as he wasn't in the habit of leaving his lab, make-shift or otherwise, in a state of disarray, he had little left to do down in the basement before heading upstairs to pack the rest of his personal belongings.

As Severus moved down the hallway towards his room, he heard voices coming for the door that was cracked open to the room he had given to Remus to use. He knew he shouldn't eavesdrop but he wanted to know his son, even if for right now that meant learning about him through cracked doorways where he wasn't meant to be listening. "…I care more about the _idea_ of him than the actual person. That's pretty selfish, huh? I just want to come first for someone. For once in my life I want an adult to handle things for me and my interests, not what they can get from me." Harry stopped talking after that and Severus continued down the hallway to his room.

There wasn't much that Severus could determine just based on what he had over heard. What he had heard gave him some hope however. His son wanted an adult to put him first. Severus wanted to take an active role in Harry's life, hopefully as a parent. Maybe Harry didn't trust him now but given time, he would prove to his son that he rely on Severus.


End file.
